


Misplaced

by MissMV



Category: Lost
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Romance, Self-Insert, who doesn't self-insert tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-30
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-01-26 15:20:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 28,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12560340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMV/pseuds/MissMV
Summary: Washed up on the shore of an uncharted Pacific Island, a dark-haired girl finds herself in the wrong place at the wrong time. With Richard's help, she'll go on a journey to find her family, but together they'll find something else along the way.





	1. At A Loss

On the beach of an uncharted island in the Pacific Ocean lay a dark-haired girl. She started coughing saltwater not so long after washing up on shore. The sun blinded her when she opened her hazel eyes, and a loud, strange ringing noise deafened her but it was over before she could understand what it was. She lay there, face down on the sand, for a few minutes, processing her surroundings: the sweet swaying of the waves, the distant screech of the seabirds, the almost imperceptible crackling of the sand beneath her. Her throat and nose and lungs burned, her limbs were sore, her head throbbed. After deciding she was not dead, the girl started to move, kneeling on the wet sand and sitting on her ankles. What she saw made her gasp, which made her have another coughing fit: a bright green jungle that seemed to extend for miles, framed by equally vibrant-colored mountains in the distance.

A wave gave her a gentle push, as if the ocean were urging her to get up and going. Struggling, the girl walked out of the water and towards the palm trees. When she stepped on the hot, dry sand she noticed she had lost both her shoes and a sock. She examined herself once she was under the shade of a palm tree: she was bruised and scratched all over, her tangled hair was a in a messy ponytail, and she had a shallow cut that ran from her left temple to her cheek.

It took her a few minutes of looking around to comprehend what was happening. When she realized no one was coming to get her, terror started creeping up in her heart. Tears began to flow as the girl staggered along the beach, crying out her family's names, over and over, until exhaustion knocked her down and she dragged herself to the shade, where she sat and bawled.

* * *

 

Her clothes and hair and tears were completely dry by the time the girl got to hear feet again. She was thirsty and hungry, and she decided that being miserable in the sand would do her no good. So the girl made a promise to herself that she would not cry for her family until she found them again. In the meantime, she'd try her best to keep herself alive.

The girl walked into the jungle, with one bare foot, seeking something to eat. She didn't dare venture too much into the island, worried that one of her sisters might really be on the beach and looking for her. She stayed at a ten-minute-walk distance from the tree line, always careful to stay parallel to it. She found mangoes and bananas, but no water. Carrying as much fruit as she could, the girl went back to the beach, hoping the water in the fruit would keep her hydrated enough until she found a lake or a river.

The sun was starting to go down in the distant horizon. It would get cold soon, the girl thought, so she tried to make a fire. She tried and tried and tried. About two hours later, when it was already dark and cold, the girl finally succeeded. She didn't give up until she had produced a decent fire, the kind of perseverance that would've made her father proud.

After feeding the bonfire with as many dry branches as she could find to keep it alive through the night, the dark-haired girl went to sleep. It was a restless sleep, for she had constant nightmares. She woke up crying several times and she chastised herself after each, mad at her subconscious for betraying her like that. If she cried for her family, it would be as if she had already accepted that she would never find them again, that they were dead. She couldn't allow this, so she immediately forced herself to sleep again, only to wake up to the same result. It was an endless loop of sleeping, dreaming, and crying that went on for hours, only broken in the early minutes of dawn.

A hint of sunlight was just peering from behind the ocean when the girl woke up, not because of a nightmare, but because of the whispers. An unintelligible murmur came from the jungle, an eerie sound that seemed to be calling her name. The girl didn't move at all, slightly frightened and almost expecting someone, or something, to pop out of the trees. But nothing did and the whispers faded, and the girl sunk back into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

 

It was well into morning when the girl woke up again. While she had a poor breakfast of mangoes and bananas, the girl reflected on the whispers she had heard a few hours earlier. She was sure that the murmur was of human voices, very creepy but human nonetheless, and she was convinced that it meant she wasn't alone on that island. "I must find them," she said to herself, "my family might be with them or maybe they can help me find my family." Resolute, the girl set off for the jungle, carrying her leftover fruit in a rickety pouch made of palm leaves.

The next two days went by monotonously, with every minute seeming to stretch longer than the previous one. In the hottest hours of the afternoon, every step the girl took built up the regret of having left the beach. She was sweaty and smelly and tired and thirsty, and she soon discovered what a pain it was to be a woman on a deserted island.

The nights were no better. The girl slept on, and covered herself with, palm leaves. She didn't dare make a big fire, scared she might set the whole jungle aflame; instead, the girl lit some branches in a hole in the ground, which didn't really provide much warmth but at least prevented her from freezing to death. She didn't rest, for she kept waking up, either from nightmares or insects crawling on her. The night in the middle of a deserted jungle was terrifying. Strange noises, including the whispers, which infiltrated themselves into the girl's dreams, came from everywhere around her, and being surrounded by pitch black darkness made being awake and asleep indistinguishable.

* * *

In was until her fourth day on the island that the girl found water. It was early morning and she was exhausted after yet another sleepless night; she felt lightheaded and her whole body ached from the lack of water and food. The girl had actually thought about lying down on the ground and letting Death find her way to her. But the faint and distant sound of falling water sparked a light in her, and she almost ran towards the sound. She found a small lake with a little waterfall cascading from the rocks opposite of where she was standing, and she would've cried if she weren't so dehydrated. The girl drank and drank and drank, feeling alive again. She washed her clothes and she skinny-dipped in the lake, washing herself for he first time in days.

A few hours later, the girl was aimlessly and peacefully floating when she noticed a particular smell in the air. It smelled like the dead boar she had found the day before. She looked around and to the left of the waterfall, shaded by the vegetation, lay the decomposing body of a boar. Except it wasn't. Upon closer inspection, the bundle of bones and putrid flesh took the shape of a human. She screamed, she had never seen a corpse before, especially not one in this state of putrefaction. After the initial fright, she got out of the water and into her clothes, and walked towards  _it_  out of morbid curiosity.

The smell was foul and made her gag. It wasn't very pleasing to the eyes either; the hot tropical weather had taken its toll on him. Next to the cadaver lay his clothes and a left shoe; the girl wondered why this man had removed all his clothes except for one shoe before dying. She had a nauseating idea. Her feet were injured from walking barefoot in the jungle for days. This man would no longer be needing his conveniently thick-soled combat boots.

Tearing up, holding her breath, disgusted by herself, she removed the right shoe from the dead man. From the pull, the man's rotten foot had separated from the leg. The girl shrieked, stumbled back, and barfed.

It took her a while to recuperate and go back for the boots and clothes, which she washed thoroughly for an hour. She learned that the man belonged to the U.S Army, and his army-green uniform had a label with his name, Fitzgerald. She laid the garments on the sun to dry and dedicated herself to have lunch.

It was way past noon when she was ready to resume her trek. She went back to Fitzgerald's body with the intention of saying a eulogy for him, but she only mumbled "I'm sorry," and covered him with foliage. She took a last sip of water and went on her way. But she didn't make it far.

"Don't move," demanded an accented voice with a click when the girl was merely steps away from the lake. She halted, surprised. A real voice! "Turn around," it ordered. Not just any voice, the voice of another girl!


	2. Help Wanted

A girl holding a rifle to her chest. The angry eyes of the other, blonde girl were threatening, and the single black eye of the rifle was paralyzing. Three or four people came out of the jungle, carrying bows and arrows, and a tall, equally angry boy also held a rifle. The dark-haired girl noticed they were all wearing army-green uniforms, like the one she herself was wearing, and she feared that the assailants would think it was her who had killed Fitzgerald.

"Be quiet!" the blonde harshly commanded when the brunette tried to talk. The dark-haired girl immediately held her tongue, surprised that this girl, who looked five or six years younger than herself, would have such authority. The tall boy, who looked just as young, cuffed her hands.

"Ouch!" the brunette girl complained, for the cuffs were too tight. The boy only looked at her, ire in his blue eyes, and spun her around, urging her to move with a push. He picked up the bag she had made with her shirt and led the way.

The girl was extremely confused. Where had these people come from? How long had they been watching her? Where were they taking her? She understood them being angry, for they must've believed she had murdered one of their own; but she didn't understand why, if they were U.S. Army, most of them carried handmade-looking bows, or why their apparent leader was a teenager.

The sun had started to go down when the small group reached a plateau where the Army had settled. She really wasn't alone! Her family could be there! The angry boy guided her towards what looked like the command tent, in the middle of a group of ten. Outside of it, a man in civilian clothes was talking to a woman whose uniform was incomplete. This struck the girl as out of place, for she thought the military had to be in uniform at all times. The woman nodded her head towards the approaching group, making the man turn around to face them.

The girl almost stopped in her tracks when she saw him. He was handsome, strikingly handsome. His bone structure, his dark eyes, the shadow of a beard, everything about him was so incredibly attractive that the girl had to remind herself that, for the moment, she was a prisoner. The man looked annoyed; not angry like her captors, just irritated. The girl forced herself to not be distracted by the man's good looks, and instead be strong, convince him that she had not killed anyone and was only looking for her family.

"We found her in the jungle," the angry boy informed him. The man almost rolled his eyes at him, and the girl wondered just who she was dealing with.

"And who are you?" the man asked her, rather harshly, lifting his eyebrows and looking almost bored.

"Who are  _you_?" the girl retorted after a second, standing taller and looking him straight in the eyes. The man chuckled, putting his hands on his hips, almost patronizingly. This infuriated her. "Did I say something funny?" she demanded, and the blonde girl grunted behind her, holding the rifle tighter. The man met her eyes again, still smiling, a swooning smile, but offered no answer.

"I'm Richard," was all he said.

"I'm Aqua," the girl replied.

"Aqua  _Fitzgerald,_ I presume," Richard stated, raising an eyebrow and cocking his head. His smile suggested that he knew that wasn't her last name. Aqua couldn't confirm Richard's statement because Fitzgerald was one of his own, and she would get accused of his murder. If she denied it, she would still get accused, but she would've been honest, at the very least.

"Lindstrom," she surrendered, with a sigh. "But I didn't kill Fitzgerald!" she quickly added. "He was already dead when I found him. Had been for several weeks, I'd say." Richard stayed silent and just looked at her, analyzing her words. Aqua held his gaze until it became unbearable and averted her eyes, blushing.

"Ellie, put the gun down," Richard ordered, his eyes still on Aqua's face.

"What?" the blonde girl, Ellie, was incredulous.

"You heard me," he turned his face to her. "Put. It. Down." His voice was so authoritative that Aqua couldn't help but blush again. Ellie reluctantly complied, and the others followed, not wanting to disobey Richard.

He took Aqua by the left arm and walked her inside the tent. She knew he was different because when she complained about his grip being too tight, he loosened it; instead of pushing her, he gestured at a chair by a little table, inviting her, rather than forcing her, to take a seat.

"I'm sorry they treated you so harshly," Richard apologized, removing the cuffs from Aqua's wrists. She didn't say anything, still a little wary of him, but she dramatically rubbed her wrists, silently agreeing that she had indeed been severely treated. "So, Aqua Lindstrom, tell me your story," Richard sat at the other end of the table, with an expectant look on his face. Aqua took her time to put her ideas in order, feeling Richard's brown eyes on her, which made her whole face feel hot.

She told him every detail of her story. How she had been on a cruising yacht with her parents and three sisters for almost two weeks before a storm sent them all to the water. How they had managed to get themselves in a life raft, where they floated away for three days until another storm sank them. Aqua told Richard that she had woken up in the island just four days before, and she had been tirelessly looking for her family since. How she had found Fitzgerald's decomposing body and stolen his clothes. When she was finished there was a pause while Richard processed everything he had just heard.

"How do you know they're on the island?" he broke the silence, finally.

"I don't," Aqua sadly confessed. "But I do know I saw someone on the beach when I first opened my eyes. And…" she hesitated, "I was hoping maybe you knew something about them." Her optimism dimmed as Richard frowned.

"I don't, I'm sorry," he sounded sincere. "The only visitors we've had don't sound like your family." Aqua lowered her eyes, sad at the bad news.

"Would you help me find them?" she asked after a minute or two of silence. "I know they're on the island, they must be," Richard looked at her with sympathy. "Please," Aqua said in a soft voice, her eyes glassy, letting down her 'tough' façade. Richard felt for her, and he knew that this girl was not dangerous and her intentions were honest.

"Wait here," he spoke after thinking over her request. He left the tent, and Aqua was left alone to wipe away her tears.

"Talk to Jacob? Why?" Ellie's raised voice traveled to Aqua's ears from outside, "Why are you going to help  _her_?" Aqua perked up at this, hoping that Richard had agreed to help her, but she didn't hear Richard's answer or another peep from Ellie. About fifteen minutes later someone brought her a tray with food and a pitcher full of fresh water, which she finished in an instant. After that, she was left alone for what seemed like hours until Richard came back. She stood up, eager to hear his response to her petition.

"Alright, I will help you," he said, and when Aqua produced an excited squeak and started jumping up and down, he raised a hand to stop her. She did right away. "But only along the perimeter of the island. If we don't find your family on the beach, then I'm sorry, but there's not much else I can do for you." Aqua contemplated this. There was a big chance her family might've ventured into the jungle, like she had, in search of food and water; but this was the best chance she had at finding them, and she was not throwing away her shot.

"Yes! Yes, that's fine, thank you," she sputtered. "Thank you," Aqua said, her whole heart poured into the words. Richard looked at the young woman standing in front of him, lost and alone, and he was glad to had made her happy.

"Yes, well," he cleared his throat, breaking the spell that had engulfed them both, "we'll leave first thing in the morning. You can sleep there," he pointed at the very back of the tent, which was actually a secluded room. "Rest well, you'll need it," and with that, he left.

Aqua settled in the little cot, crying tears of happiness. With the Army's help, she had a real chance at finding her family! She would see them soon, she was sure. With this happy feeling in her heart, she laid her head on the pillow, and submerged in a much-needed, uninterrupted sleep.


	3. What I Fear

"Get up," the witch in Aqua's dream uttered. "Get up, I said!" Aqua opened her hazel eyes, and the witch was standing there, yellow-haired and angry. "Richard said it's time for you to leave," said Ellie, left the tray she was carrying on the floor and exited the room. Aqua ate hurriedly, not wanting to miss a moment of the search.

Outside the tent, Richard was waiting for her, a big backpack on his back, and a smaller one in his outstretched hand, which he gave to Aqua.

"You ready?" he asked her. Aqua took a deep breath and nodded enthusiastically. "Let's go, then," and he set course towards the jungle. She looked around, waiting for the rest of the search party to join in, but nobody did.

"Wait, is it just you and me?" she asked Richard, catching up to him and intercepting his path.

"Yes," he dryly answered. That's when she noticed the rifle on his shoulder.

"What's that for?" she inquired, pointing at the gun.

"In case we encounter something undesirable," Aqua gave him a suspicious look, making a mental note, as Richard walked past her, to stay at a reasonable distance from him, no matter how attractive she found him.

* * *

The day went by uneventful, without any sign of the Lindstrom family anywhere. At night – Aqua calculated it to be around 9 pm – they settled on a beach; Richard produced a fire skillfully in a matter of minutes. In the backpack Richard had handed her, Aqua found her clothes and a couple of blankets to sleep in. During the day, they had only exchanged a few polite sentences, but now that they were going to sleep close to each other, Aqua didn't want things to be even more awkward, so she broke the ice.

"I don't know your last name," she called to Richard, as he fed the bonfire; she was sitting on a blanket, eating and watching him work.

"Alpert," he replied and kept working.

"And how old are you, Richard Alpert?" The man chuckled, like he had before when they met. Aqua couldn't understand why everything she asked him seemed to be so amusing.

"I'm 36," he answered and didn't ask back. Only thirteen years older than herself, thought Aqua, perhaps a little too cheery.

"Are you their leader?" she tried to keep the conversation flowing.

"In a way," Richard said after pondering it for a few seconds. It was clear that he wasn't going to elaborate much on his answers or ask something back, so Aqua stopped insisting. Then she realized what a strange answer he had given her.  _In a way?_ What was that supposed to mean? You either are or aren't the leader, she thought.

Throughout the day, Aqua had contemplated over and over the events occurred the previous afternoon: a couple of teenagers had enough power to be the only ones allowed to bear rifles; not everyone in the camp wore uniform; their leader had introduced himself by his first name, not by rank or surname. She summed up all these details until she came to a conclusion.

"So, Richard, what did you do to the U.S. Army?" she quipped. This immediately caught Richard's attention, who stopped his task completely and stared at her, an indecipherable look in his face. "I know you're not military, any of you. I'm not stupid. You couldn't care less about Fitzgerald being dead and me stealing his clothes. So… What happened to them?" Richard only looked at her for a few seconds before nodding and raising his eyebrows to himself, slightly impressed by Aqua's deducting capabilities. He dropped the last log in the fire and sat next to her.

"You're one smart girl." Aqua beamed at the compliment. "I killed them all," Richard confessed, matter-of-factly, and the smile in Aqua's face quickly dropped. For the first time, she was  _afraid_  of him. Richard took notice of this. "They wouldn't leave peacefully," he began explaining. "They put my people and our island in danger. I couldn't allow that. They brought it upon themselves, left me no other choice." Aqua was in a stunned silence. She couldn't say she wasn't expecting that answer, but Richard's coldness scared her. She suddenly became very aware that she was a day's walk away from other people, alone with an armed man who had murdered a military platoon with no remorse. "I'm not going to hurt you," he broke the silence, startling Aqua. In a kinder voice, he continued, "I sincerely wish to help you. You're lost and scared and miss your family. I know what that's like."

"Why didn't you bring anyone else?" Aqua asked in a whisper. Richard took a deep breath before answering.

"They have another, very important task to complete. The Army left a major problem in our hands, and they're trying to get rid of it," he smiled after this enigmatic response, trying to calm Aqua's nerves. It almost worked.

She was very tired, but she refused to fall asleep before Richard, still wary of him; she lay on her side, with his back to him and the fire, waiting. A half an hour later she heard the faintest snore coming his way, so she turned over to feel the warmth on her face. Richard was sleeping on his back, with one arm under his head. He looked so at peace and so very handsome, that Aqua's heart started beating faster, and she couldn't understand why. Musing over her feelings for Richard, she slowly drifted away, engulfed by the darkness, asleep and dreaming in a heartbeat.

* * *

Aqua is walking through the island with Richard. Except it isn't Richard. It is Fitzgerald, redheaded and scared. They are running. He is only wearing one boot.  _She_ is only wearing one boot. It starts raining. A dark shadow is following them, so close so close  _so_ close. Her mother in the distance, on the other side a clearing. Then her sister and her sister. She almost reaches the clearing, she is so close!  _It_ is so close. She runs and runs and Fitzgerald is gone. The clearing! She is running across it, but the ground turns to sand and the sand turns to water. She is running on water, sinking more and more and more with every step. She can almost touch them. But they jump into the water, one by one. Why why why. The dark shadow is here, the dark shadow is taking her. Don't please don't. They're waving, they're underwater. She stretches, but she can't reach them. Gone gone gone. They smile, she smiles, she wakes up, she's underwater, she drowns. Gone gone gone.

* * *

Her eyes shot open; she was heaving. Richard had woken up a few minutes before, when he heard her whimpering. He was concerned, for Aqua was shaking, crying, and grasping for air. It took her a few minutes to calm down, and when she finally did, she didn't have the energy to look over at Richard, whose gaze she could feel intensely fixated on her. She remained still for a few more minutes, looking at the stars above her, tears streaming down each side of her face.

"Are you alright?" Richard's worried voice reached her from the other side of the crackling fire. She slowly nodded, avoiding his eyes. Richard didn't believe her, but he didn't know how to help her. Aqua wanted his help, but she didn't know how to ask for it. They let the silence fall between them, aware of what they wanted, but unable to express it.

"Can you…" Aqua was finally able to whisper. She swallowed. "Can you talk to me?"

"What do you want me to tell you?" Richard asked softly, eager to make her feel better.

"Anything. Just…talk to me. Please," it was almost a plea, and she broke Richard's heart.

"Do you see that constellation up there?" he said after a couple of minutes. The sky was clear and full of stars. He had learned the celestial map after countless sleepless nights on the island. "That's Centaurus, the centaur. The brightest star at the bottom is Alpha Centauri. And that small one…" he kept going, talking about stars with passion. Aqua forgot why she had been wary of him, and she promptly fell asleep to Richard's soothing voice.


	4. Now I Know

The next morning, Richard was fishing when Aqua woke up; he actually wanted to surprise her by having breakfast ready for her. She sat up and looked at him, all his focus on the task, and he couldn't look more handsome. Aqua remembered how tender his voice had been last night and how concerned he had seemed. But she whisked away these thoughts, embarrassed at her schoolgirlish crush on him.

During the next two days, they managed to hold actual conversations. There were still boundaries they didn't dare crossing; Richard didn't ask about Aqua's family, and she avoided talking about them; Richard never revealed much about his people, and despite dying of curiosity about the  _other, very important task_  they were taking care of, Aqua didn't ask.

Aqua learned that Richard had lived 'a very long part of his life' on the island. He knew it pretty much by heart, as proven by the several times he had pointed out exactly where a creek was located for them to refill their water canteens, or the type of fruit they could find around to eat. He knew how to hunt wild boars and birds with a bow and arrow and how to fish with a spear. He told her about the time a spider bit him and paralyzed his right arm for a week. He told her about setting traps for animals and about how he had tried to dismantle the traps the Army had scattered around ("You're lucky you didn't come across one of those when you were alone," he had said to her). He told her many things, and she earnestly listened to his every story.

On his part, Richard let Aqua talk ceaselessly about herself, paying genuine attention. He asked her about her degree when she mentioned she had just graduated college that year. He made snarky remarks about her ex-boyfriend when she talked about their breakup, and even gasped when she mentioned that she had seen him a week later, smooching one of her friends. With every sign that Richard was listening, really listening, Aqua's heart grew fonder. From time to time, she used words that he didn't quite understand, but he didn't ask for clarification, not wanting to interrupt the beautiful flow of her voice.

They had a connection, and they both knew it; sometimes they'd exchange glances and immediately look away, blushing, smiling at themselves like a couple of teenagers. Neither brought up the first night, but it was the ever-present turning point of their relationship. And on the third night, they had a conversation that would bring them closer.

* * *

They had set camp a little earlier than before, for Aqua had gotten too tired after they had walked across a rocky beach. The sun was already hidden in the horizon, but there was still light, the kind of light that strains the eyes. Aqua was siting on her ankles, facing the ocean, when she remembered something. She counted the days she had spent on the island, plus the days on the life raft, and then the days on the yacht. It had been three weeks since the Lindstroms had sailed off, and it was today when they were supposed to have reached their destination. Aqua's heart ached, and concealed by the sound of the crashing waves, she cried for her family.

Richard noticed when he went to bring her water, despite her looking the other way and wiping away the tears. He didn't say anything, he just sat in silence with her, and Aqua was grateful for his company. The light was all gone when she felt good enough to talk to him.

"It's my parents' anniversary," she whispered. "As of today, they've been married for thirty years." Richard showed his genuine interest, and Aqua gave him a warm smile. Looking down, she said, "That's why we were on the yacht; they bought it, called it  _The Pearl_ ," she chuckled sadly. "We were supposed to get to the resort today for our vacation together." Richard could almost hear the broken pieces of her heart in her voice. They sat still for a few more minutes, Richard unsure of what to say, and Aqua looking expectantly at the ocean.

"Do you want to tell me about them?" Richard finally asked. "Your family, I mean. What are they like?" Aqua gradually smiled, hoping she wouldn't burst into tears in the middle of a sentence. She took a deep breath and began.

"My parents are the most amazing couple I've ever met," she said, nostalgic. "They've never been apart, and they love each other very much. They really are wonderful parents, gave us all we could ever wish for, without spoiling us.

"My older sisters are twins, Gaia and Aria. They're twenty five. Gaia's engaged, getting married next June. Aria wants to be a neurosurgeon; she's the smart one. And my baby sister Kay just turned twenty. We look alike the most. She's a drama queen, but I love her with all my heart, and I'd give my life for her," her voice cracked. She couldn't go on, and Richard didn't push her.

"They sound wonderful," Richard's unfeigned words warmed Aqua's heart, and she gave him an honest smile.

"Thank you for listening," Aqua said softly.

"Thank you for telling me," replied Richard.

They gazed at each other. Oh! How badly she wanted to kiss him! She would've dared, if she'd known he wanted to kiss her too. But neither made a move, and the moment passed. They just smiled and looked away. Richard went back to tend the fire, and they were each left with their thoughts.

Aqua finally admitted to herself that she had real, romantic feelings for Richard. She wanted him to touch her, to put his strong arms around her, and just hold her, dry her tears and kiss her face. But this was all wrong, she had just met him! He was a leader and older than her; he couldn't be attracted to her. She didn't want to come across as a desperate, immature girl. But he was so attentive, he cared about her… Did he really? Perhaps she was just making it all up and Richard didn't like her that way.

But he did. Richard liked everything about her. From the moment he first saw her, from her first words to him, those almost arrogant words that concealed such a sweet heart, he knew she was special. She was as lost as he had been once, and he wanted to protect her, to deliver her to her family safely and unharmed. He wanted  _her_. But he was old, he had already scared her once, and because she was vulnerable, Richard didn't want to come across as an opportunist taking advantage of her. So he didn't touch her, he didn't kiss her, and it ached, but it was for the best.

That night, as they slept on opposite sides of the bonfire, they dreamed of each other.


	5. Something Undesirable

On the sixth day of the search, Aqua's hopes were starting to fade away.

After waking up, as always, Richard shaved with the ocean water. Aqua actually preferred his five o'clock shadow, for it looked as if he had dipped half his face in ashes. He watched him perform this almost automatic ritual, as always, longing for his hands to caress her face. If they didn't find her family, she'd be satisfied if she could stay with him.

In the afternoon, the sky began to turn gray. It was a pleasant change of scenery, and the absence of the blinding, burning sun gave Aqua more energy to keep walking. It rained for a few minutes, and Aqua delighted in the soft droplets of water on her face; Richard delighted in watching her so lightheartedly at peace.

It stopped raining and the sun came out for a couple hours, but Richard knew the island and its weather too well, so he stopped the trek. Aqua didn't protest. While Richard set up the small waterproof ridge tent he had brought, Aqua started a fire; Richard had taught her how to do it properly, and she was very proud of herself when a small flame burned.

Richard fished so that they could eat a substantial meal before the impending downpour arrived. Aqua was admiring his skills from afar when the air filled with a metallic rumble. She spun around, every hair in her body standing on end. She had never heard anything like that. It was a metallic roar, a force ripping through the jungle, approaching them at unbelievable speed. She ran for Richard, who was already out of the water and heading for his rifle and his backpack. He took out a pouch and made the frightened Aqua stand in one place while he drew a circle around her with what looked like ashes. When he was done, he stood in front of her, protecting her with his body, aiming the rifle at the jungle. Aqua didn't understand, and she clung to Richard's soaking shirt, peeking over his side.

That's when  _it_ came out of the jungle. It was the dark shadow from her nightmares. It flew towards them, made Aqua scream, and halted right in front of Richard's defiant face. Through her tears, Aqua observed the thing; it was dark as the night, and it made terrifying crackling noises, as if filled with hundreds of little thunderstorms. She couldn't say how, but she knew it was watching her. She hid her face behind Richard's back, willing the thing to go away.

"Leave," Richard commanded the thing. It stared him down, surrounded them both, roved about their camp, and just as fast as it had come, it left. Richard pointed the gun a few minutes more, making sure the thing wouldn't come back. The air felt electrical. Richard lowered the gun and turned around, facing Aqua, who hugged his waist tightly, still utterly terrified, shaking and sobbing. He hesitated for a second before putting his arms around her, and he held her and dried her tears, whispering soothing words to her.

"What… was that?" she muttered in between sobs.

"An evil creature," Richard said with a hard voice. "But it's gone now, alright?" he looked at her while he said this, "As long as you're inside this circle, it can't harm you." He held her face with both hands, wiped her tears with his thumbs, and stroked her cheeks. She nodded, closed her eyes, and rested her head on his hand. Richard kissed the top of her head, reassuringly, before stepping out of the circle to survey the tree line. She was taken aback by this gesture, and a smile slipped through her fear.

Aqua sat inside the ash circle for the next hour and a half. The sky had turned gray again, so Richard rushed into the water to fish and then towards the fire to cook.

"Are you ever coming out of there?" he quipped while he handed her the food, trying to lighten the mood.

"You'll have to drag me out," Aqua rolled her eyes at him and giggled. She couldn't believe Richard could make her forget about the murderous smoke monster, but he did.

* * *

The rain started not long after they had finished eating. Richard told her that they'd be safe and dry inside the tent, if they could only let aside the fact that it was so small. She made him assure her three times that they'd really be safe from the monster inside it, and she forced him to double up the ash circle before stepping into the tent.

It was indeed very small, designed for one soldier only. They were extremely close, and Richard had to crouch in order to fit. Aqua's face felt hot and tingly, and her heart was beating so hard she was sure Richard could hear it. She was so nervous about being in such a confined space with him and even more about the fact that they'd be sleeping just a couple of inches away from each other.

To make everything less awkward, they immediately lay down to sleep, with their backs to each other. Richard was the first one to fall asleep, snoring intermittently. Aqua stayed awake a little longer, thinking about the monster. Where had it come from? Why had it attacked them?  _What_ was it? She dwelled on these questions until the thunder, the rain, the waves, and Richard's deep breathing lullabied her to sleep.

* * *

It was around midnight when the whispers came back. Aqua had been dreaming about her sisters when she heard them; it was still raining and thundering, but they were unmistakable. Richard was still asleep beside her, unaware of the voices. Aqua stared at the tent's wall unblinkingly and almost holding her breath, hoping that the eerie sound would disappear if she pretended not to had heard it. They didn't leave but instead brought something else. Thunder roared and seconds later, lightning illuminated the sky, revealing the silhouette of a man standing right outside the tent. Aqua screeched in horror, waking Richard up as the silhouette disappeared.

"What is it? What happened?" Richard asked in a groggy, alarmed voice.

"There's a man outside," Aqua let out in a panicked whisper. Richard didn't hesitate and immediately grabbed the rifle and exited the tent. He was out for a minute or two, but it was an eternity for Aqua. When he came back he was a little agitated but tried his best to reassure her.

"He's gone now, okay? He won't come near you anymore," he said.

"Who was he? Did you kill him?" Aqua asked, crying, and she somehow knew that the silhouette had something to do with the smoke creature.

"Just… try to go back to sleep, alright? We'll keep moving in the morning," Richard was trying to stay calm for Aqua's sake, and he made her lie down again, this time facing him. He changed his wet shirt, and Aqua couldn't help catching a glimpse of his bare chest. With eyes closed, letting the tears fall, she felt him lay next to her, and without looking at him, she clung to his shirt again.

Richard let her. Embracing her with both arms, he moved her closer to him and kissed her head as she nuzzled against his chest. In the dark of the night, with the storm raging outside, Richard and Aqua slept in the little tent, intertwined, hearts beating as one.


	6. Interlude

It was a cold morning. The air had a tint of blue. The seabirds made soft noises, the swaying of the waves was sweeter than ever, and the sand sang beneath Aqua's feet. She touched the faint scar on her cheek; that one would fade away.

She took off Fitzgerald’s uniform, wondering if his soul was still on the island. She stood on the line where the Earth met the Sea, letting the water bury her feet in the sand. There was nothing beyond the horizon, not anymore. Like a snow globe, the Island was all there was now, and she'd be content with staying inside it.

Aqua stripped off her underwear and submerged in the Pacific waters. Despite the sea being so cold, she didn't feel it. She swam until she exhausted herself, letting the delicate waves hold her. Floating aimlessly, she looked at the sky, the sun starting to rise and making the stars disappear. Aqua closed her eyes as the last star went off, and she let the ocean wash everything away. 

* * *

 

Aqua put on the clothes she was wearing when she arrived to the island and tended the fire. Richard, sleepy, was surprised to see her up and productive, for he thought that she might have wanted to sleep a little longer.

“Hey,” he called, startling Aqua.

“Hey,” she said back, turning her face to see him. She had dark circles under her puffy eyes. He sat by the fire with her, at a loss for words. He opted for not saying anything, not wanting to put pressure on her but instead letting her open up at her own rhythm. He held her hand, and she cried a little, but promptly wiped away the tears.

“It's okay to cry. Crying doesn't make you weak,” he said softly.

“I know,” she replied. “I know that I'm not weak, and I like that you believe I'm not.” There was a long pause. Aqua inhaled deeply, shakily before continuing, “I will cry when I need to, but right now… I cannot let the pain consume me.” She looked at his scratched face, feeling a pang of guilt, and she swallowed.

“But it's okay to feel that pain.”

“I know that; I do. But you don't dwell in your grief, you overcome it.” She looked at the fire. “I got a second chance to live, and I will make the most of it, for them. I know I will heal, but it might take me months, years even. And I will need you,” she squeezed his hand, “to pick me up when I crumble.”

Richard was moved. Every day, his feelings for Aqua grew stronger, but in this moment, he realized just how strong she really was.

“I'm sorry,” she said suddenly, baffling Richard.

“Why would you be sorry for?” he asked in genuine disconcertment.

“For hurting you. For attacking you.” With shame in her voice, she turned her face away from him.

“Oh. Hey,” Richard's voice was kind, not mad at all about the incident. With his fingertips he slowly made Aqua face him again, her eyes teary. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I do,” she whimpered. “What I did was horrible and unforgivable.”

“Well, I _forgive_ you,” he smiled at her, a hand still on her chin. She smiled with a sob and threw herself into his arms, hugging his neck and crying on his shoulder. 

* * *

 

By mid-morning it was warm. Richard didn't know what to do. It was a grim fact, but he knew that they wouldn't keep searching the island. He also didn't want to force Aqua to go back to his people right away. He joined her, and they both watched the horizon with their feet in the water.

“Let's stay here,” she said, as if she had read his mind. “I mean, for a little while. It's a beautiful cove, and I don't feel ready to meet your people. And I don’t… really believe we’ll find my dad or Aria. For all I know, they might still be at sea,” Aqua said somberly. “I need some time alone,” she paused. “Alone with you,” she finished, holding his hand, blushing. This was a clear invitation for him to kiss her, and he did. He kissed her on the cheek, and she smiled, satisfied.

For three days they talked and kept each other busy. Aqua requested that Richard taught her everything he could, from fire making to hunting. Richard didn’t kiss her again, but they were more comfortable around each other. Their relationship grew stronger; Richard now had the right words to say to her when she needed them, and Aqua no longer felt intimidated by him. Richard told her everything she needed to know about his people, the island, and about Jacob. At night, they talked about stars as they lay side by side. Aqua's days as a castaway were over, and her days as an islander had just begun.


	7. Gone, Gone, Gone

Midnight, deprived of sound. Aqua's own heartbeat sounded like a ticking bomb in her ears. She didn't know when the transition from being asleep to awake happened. In a crescendo, the murmur of spectral whispers, more urgent than before, called for her.

She sat up. Even the ocean was quiet. The voices of the dead beseeched her to go back to sleep, to wake Richard, to protect herself, but she couldn't hear them, no matter how loud they spoke. A shadow emerged from the trees and set her heart into a frenzy. She was about to wake Richard when the shadow adopted a shape. It was a short, chubby shape, with curly hair as dark as the night. It walked until the moonlight illuminated it, and Aqua saw her own hazel eyes in the figure.

Kay.

Aqua gasped and slowly got to her feet. She didn't run but rather stumbled towards her, her little sister. Could it really be her? Kay smiled, and Aqua reached for her face, almost afraid that she'd go through her like a ghost, like in her dreams. Aqua let out the breath she was holding when she realized it really was her sister, and she pulled her in an embrace, letting the tears fall in Kay’s hair.

“It's really you, you're here!” Aqua kept repeating. She beamed, kissing her sister’s cheeks, crying.

“Of course it's me, silly.”

“Oh, I've missed you so much,” Aqua said, tears falling down her cheeks. “I've been looking for you for days, I was so scared…”

“I know, I know. But there's no time for that, we have to go,” Kay whispered and pulled Aqua into the jungle, taking her by surprise.

“Where? Are you alone?”

“Mom is with me, and Gaia,” Kay said in a voice that was just above a whisper. Aqua thought this was strange, for her sister was always so loud. She dismissed the thought, just happy to have her sister back.

Then she noticed that they were walking on an opposite direction from Aqua’s camp.

“Wait, Richard…” she started saying.

“No! I don't trust him,” her sister replied.

“I do. He's nice, Kay Kay, I really like him.”

“You shouldn't, he's dangerous,” Kay’s voice was a hurried whisper, as if she were afraid of being caught.

“Richard?”

“Yes, he and Jacob.” Aqua was surprised her sister knew who Jacob was. “We _have_ to get rid of them, they're dangerous,” Kay said. Aqua was confused, so she stopped walking. Kay didn't look happy about it.

“What do you mean? How do you know Jacob? Kay, what's wrong?”

“Get. Away. From her,” Richard's furious voice chimed in, preventing Kay from answering. Aqua turned to him, confused, but when she saw the rifle aimed at Kay, her blood went cold. She pushed the rifle’s forearm and faced Richard.

“What are you doing?! She's my sister!” she cried. Richard had fire in his eyes, and he didn't avert them from Kay, who stood still, unfazed.

“That is _not_ your sister,” Richard growled.

“What are you talking about?! Of course she is!” Aqua was still crying, baffled.

“See, sis? I told you he was dangerous. He's going to get you killed if we don't kill him first. Remember Isabella, Richard?” Kay’s voice was icy and almost frightening. Richard tensed at the mention of Isabella, and Aqua wondered who that could be. She started getting nervous, unsure what to believe anymore.

“I'll tell you one last time, stay away from her,” Richard uttered angrily, with clenched teeth, taking a step towards Kay.

“Or you're going to _kill me_?” she said, mockingly. Richard fired two warning shots at Kay's feet, making Aqua scream.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” she screeched in desperation. Kay was right, her initial suspicion was correct, Richard really was dangerous. Kay lifted her hands, looking slightly annoyed.

“As you wish,” she said. And talking to Aqua, “But I'll see _you_ soon enough. Mom, Gaia, and I are waiting for you.” She smiled and wandered off. Aqua made a move to follow her, but Richard caught her with one arm, while the other still aimed the gun. Aqua fought against him, but he was too strong.

“Let go of me! Kay! Kay! Don't touch me! _KAY_!” she screamed, struggling, and she fell to her knees, dragging Richard down with her.

“Aqua, stop!” Richard struggled back, and she slapped him with all her strength. He finally gave in, and Aqua crawled away from his touch, and turned to the spot where her sister had been. It was pointless. In the dark of the night, she had vanished. Again.

Aqua's breathing turned heavy, her blood turned to fire, rage growing in her, ready to explode. Unconscious of her own actions, she attacked Richard. She jumped at him, screeching and scratching. He skillfully shielded himself, managing to take hold of Aqua's wrists.

“ _WHY?!_ That was my _sister,_ you son of a bitch!” she screamed. Richard rolled over, putting his weight on Aqua and pinning her down.

“Listen to me! That was _not_ your sister!” Richard screamed back. This renewed Aqua's anger, and she fought with unbelievable strength, managing to scratch Richard's arms and face. He repeated the same thing, over and over. She's not your sister, she's not your sister, she's not your sister. It's the monster, it's the monster, it's the monster. Aqua yelled and yelled, calling Kay's name, but never got an answer.

“I know her, I touched her, I know it was her! _Kay_!”

“Your sister is _dead_!” Richard's voice roared above Aqua's. She stopped fighting when she processed his words. The angry tears turned to sad tears, tears of disbelief. Like a deer in the headlights, Aqua froze, eyes wide open, dumbfounded. Richard slowly let go of her hands, and she remained lying where she was. A knot had formed in her throat, and her whole body felt weak.

A few minutes went by before Aqua could move. Sitting up, she avoided Richard's gaze.

“How could you know that?” she whispered.

“That was the monster. He adopts the form of someone who has died, and he plays tricks with your mind,” Richard explained somberly. “I'm really sorry, Aqua, but I'm afraid your mother and sisters are…” Aqua didn't hear the end of the sentence, for her brain went fuzzy, muffling the sound of his voice and making the world spin around. She felt very light, empty, like she could float away with the slightest breeze.

With Richard's help, she stood up and staggered back to their camp. Richard followed close behind. She collapsed on the wet sand, the ocean water hugging her with every wave. Down in her knees, she let out the most heartbreaking cry Richard had ever heard. He let her cry alone until he noticed she couldn't hold herself up anymore. So he took her in his arms, carried her back to the bonfire, and lay down with her. She wept, protected by Richard's embrace, until there was nothing else in her, a broken, empty vase, swept away by the darkness of unconsciousness.


	8. Interlude

It was a cold morning. The air had a tint of blue. The seabirds made soft noises, the swaying of the waves was sweeter than ever, and the sand sang beneath Aqua's feet. She touched the faint scar on her cheek; that one would fade away.

She took off Fitzgerald’s uniform, wondering if his soul was still on the island. She stood on the line where the Earth met the Sea, letting the water bury her feet in the sand. There was nothing beyond the horizon, not anymore. Like a snow globe, the Island was all there was now, and she'd be content with staying inside it.

Aqua stripped off her underwear and submerged in the Pacific waters. Despite the sea being so cold, she didn't feel it. She swam until she exhausted herself, letting the delicate waves hold her. Floating aimlessly, she looked at the sky, the sun starting to rise and making the stars disappear. Aqua closed her eyes as the last star went off, and she let the ocean wash everything away. 

* * *

 

Aqua put on the clothes she was wearing when she arrived to the island and tended the fire. Richard, sleepy, was surprised to see her up and productive, for he thought that she might have wanted to sleep a little longer.

“Hey,” he called, startling Aqua.

“Hey,” she said back, turning her face to see him. She had dark circles under her puffy eyes. He sat by the fire with her, at a loss for words. He opted for not saying anything, not wanting to put pressure on her but instead letting her open up at her own rhythm. He held her hand, and she cried a little, but promptly wiped away the tears.

“It's okay to cry. Crying doesn't make you weak,” he said softly.

“I know,” she replied. “I know that I'm not weak, and I like that you believe I'm not.” There was a long pause. Aqua inhaled deeply, shakily before continuing, “I will cry when I need to, but right now… I cannot let the pain consume me.” She looked at his scratched face, feeling a pang of guilt, and she swallowed.

“But it's okay to feel that pain.”

“I know that; I do. But you don't dwell in your grief, you overcome it.” She looked at the fire. “I got a second chance to live, and I will make the most of it, for them. I know I will heal, but it might take me months, years even. And I will need you,” she squeezed his hand, “to pick me up when I crumble.”

Richard was moved. Every day, his feelings for Aqua grew stronger, but in this moment, he realized just how strong she really was.

“I'm sorry,” she said suddenly, baffling Richard.

“Why would you be sorry for?” he asked in genuine disconcertment.

“For hurting you. For attacking you.” With shame in her voice, she turned her face away from him.

“Oh. Hey,” Richard's voice was kind, not mad at all about the incident. With his fingertips he slowly made Aqua face him again, her eyes teary. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I do,” she whimpered. “What I did was horrible and unforgivable.”

“Well, I _forgive_ you,” he smiled at her, a hand still on her chin. She smiled with a sob and threw herself into his arms, hugging his neck and crying on his shoulder. 

* * *

 

By mid-morning it was warm. Richard didn't know what to do. It was a grim fact, but he knew that they wouldn't keep searching the island. He also didn't want to force Aqua to go back to his people right away. He joined her, and they both watched the horizon with their feet in the water.

“Let's stay here,” she said, as if she had read his mind. “I mean, for a little while. It's a beautiful cove, and I don't feel ready to meet your people. And I don’t… really believe we’ll find my dad or Aria. For all I know, they might still be at sea,” Aqua said somberly. “I need some time alone,” she paused. “Alone with you,” she finished, holding his hand, blushing. This was a clear invitation for him to kiss her, and he did. He kissed her on the cheek, and she smiled, satisfied.

For three days they talked and kept each other busy. Aqua requested that Richard taught her everything he could, from fire making to hunting. Richard didn’t kiss her again, but they were more comfortable around each other. Their relationship grew stronger; Richard now had the right words to say to her when she needed them, and Aqua no longer felt intimidated by him. Richard told her everything she needed to know about his people, the island, and about Jacob. At night, they talked about stars as they lay side by side. Aqua's days as a castaway were over, and her days as an islander had just begun.


	9. When We Are

“That is disgusting,” Aqua said as Richard gutted a fish.

“Well, it's your turn to do it,” he retorted, handing her the knife.

She was holding the small fish she had managed to catch ¾which was disgusting enough¾ and gave Richard a discouraged look. He smiled at her and urged her to go on. She split the fish’s belly open, inserted her hand, and pulled out the guts; their texture was nasty, and having to rip them apart made her squirm. She then removed the gills and chopped off the head. She didn't puke, so Richard was very proud of her.

“Just wait until you learn to gut a boar.” Richard laughed when Aqua made a face of disgust.

It was a warm afternoon, not too sunny, and Aqua felt inspired to do nothing. She took one of her blankets and laid it on the sand, where she sat to contemplate the ocean and her new life. Back in the outside world, she was about to start a new job, her first serious job; she was also thinking about pursuing a postgraduate degree, although she knew that actually doing it would put unbearable stress on her shoulders. But here on the island, inside the snow globe, none of that mattered anymore. Nothing mattered; she could live a stress-free, capitalism-free life now. It could be like a permanent vacation, with some hunting added to it.

“What're you thinking of?” Richard interrupted her contemplation.

“My new life on the island,” she answered sincerely, a little nostalgic.

“Oh…” He seemed to be debating whether or not to tell her something. “You know… If you don't want to stay here… I suppose I could find a way to get you back home,” he finished without looking at Aqua, who thought over this surprising proposition.

“Oh! Well… I don't know. I don't really have a home anymore. I guess if I ever get tired of living in the middle of nowhere, I'll ask you to send me back,” she smiled, “but for now, I'm content here.” Richard smiled, too, giving her butterflies. She looked down at the sand and noticed that Richard, fully dressed as he was, was sitting directly _on_ the sand. This bothered her. “How can you sit on the sand like that?” He didn't answer but instead gestured at himself, sarcastically. Aqua rolled her eyes. “Of course, but doesn't the sand bother you?”

“No, why would it?”

“I don't know,” she shrugged. “I don't like sand… It's coarse and rough and irritating, and it gets everywhere,” Aqua said monotonously, looking over at Richard to see his reaction.

“Yeah, I suppose you're right,” was all he said. Aqua raised her eyebrows at him, but he didn't seem to catch it.

“Really? _‘Anakin_ _Skywalker’_? You don't… You don't get the reference?” she asked, but Richard frowned, unsure of what she was talking about. “ _‘Episode_ _II_ , _Attack_ _of_ _the_ _Clones’_?” Still nothing. “ _‘Star Wars’_?” she asked almost desperately. Richard gave her a funny look, as if she had just spluttered out senseless words. “Huh. Well, I guess you don't get many films on an island.”

“You're right about that.”

“You do know what films are, right?”

“I do, actually,” Richard said, chuckling.

“Yeah, well. Although, _Star Wars_ has been a really big thing for many years, so you should at least have heard of it!” Aqua took _Star Wars_ very seriously.

“I'm sorry. Never heard of it.” Richard found the whole situation really funny.

“Well, you're missing out on something amazing,” she said very seriously and gave Richard the side-eye while he chuckled. They stayed in comfortable silence, listening to the waves, for a little while. Aqua thought that, since she was going to stay on the island, she might as well ask him about something that had been haunting her for days, and that Richard had kept from her. “Richard, what's the ‘other, very important task’ your people are taking care of?”

“I knew you wouldn't let it go,” he smiled. He took a deep breath, and Aqua could already tell that it would be something very serious. “It's a bomb,” he said dryly, and Aqua's jaw dropped. “A hydrogen bomb.” Aqua's blood went cold. “I presume they've already buried it, so it's safe now,” he explained.

“Safe?! It's an H bomb! That thing is the opposite of safe!” Aqua was starting to get nervous.

“Hey, don't worry, really. I've been assured that burying the bomb would keep the island safe for many, many years, alright?” Richard tried to calm her down.

“Why would the Army bring an H bomb here?” she asked, trying to breathe more steadily.

“From what they told me, they were carrying out nuclear tests in South Pacific islands. They found us and thought it would be a good idea to try their bomb here.”

“I can't believe I'll say this, but I'm glad you killed them,” Aqua said grimly. “Wait, nuclear tests? What for?” Richard shrugged. “I mean, yes, the world is shitty right now, but I didn't know the U.S. was running nuclear tests again!”

“What do you mean ‘again’?” Richard asked, frowning.

“Well, uh, from what I know, the last time the United States tried their hydrogen bombs in the Pacific was, like, sixty years ago!”

“Sixty years ago?” Richard was starting to suspect something was off.

“Yeah, in the 1950s. Gosh, that's just horrible!” she exclaimed, imagining the outside world jumping into another, nuclear world war.

“Aqua, what year were you born?” Richard asked out of the blue.

“1994, why? What's that have to do with anything?” she questioned him as he went pale. “What is it?”

“ _This is_ the 50s,” he said when he regained composure.

“Yeah, I bet that's how it feels like in a deserted island,” Aqua quipped, wondering why he had brought that up.

“No, Aqua. We _are_ in 1954,” Richard said. Aqua looked at him as if he had gone mad.

“Yeah, right. I know you might not have calendars around here, but it's actually 2017.”

“Not here, not now, no. _You_ come from 2017, but right _now_ it's 1954.” He looked almost like a lunatic, spitting out incoherences.

“Oh, so what? I magically time-traveled?” Aqua was getting tired of the nonsense.

“Well, yes!” Richard could see she did not believe him. “Remember I told you we had visitors? One of them told me they came from the future. I saw him disappear in front of my own eyes. They arrived and disappeared the same day you said you washed up on the the beach.” She twisted her features into a face of disbelief. He let out a desperate groan. “Look!” He brought his backpack and took out a journal he handed to Aqua. “Look at it and convince yourself!”

Cautiously, Aqua took the journal, which had PROPERTY U.S. ARMY printed on one of the covers. In it she found several entries and illustrations of a bomb, with JUGHEAD written above the drawings. All the pages were dated; _1954_ written on every single one of them. One of the last entries read: ‘Native inhabitants. Hostile.’

Aqua remained silent as she let the information sink in. She did believe Richard, coming to the realization that she had always suspected something to be wrong, that she had always felt an unnatural aura coming off the island. She remembered now, with sudden clarity, that she had indeed seen someone ¾her father, perhaps¾ lying on the sand a few feet away from her that first day, but who was inexplicably gone in the blink of an eye, making her believe that it had been nothing but an illusion.

“So you're telling me,” Aqua said slowly and quietly, not looking at Richard, “that half of my family is dead, and the other half is _probably_ alive sixty years in the future? You're telling me that my dad won't be born for another ten years?” Her voice broke, and tears started to flow. “How is this even possible?!”

“The Island has… special properties,” Richard answered, hesitantly. “Time doesn’t work the same here.”

“What special properties? What _is_ this place?” Aqua was going hysterical. She stood up and backed away from Richard, as if that could make his words be untrue. “I want to go back! SEND ME BACK!” she screamed. Richard followed her as she stumbled backwards toward the jungle with eyes wide and on the verge of hyperventilating. He lifted his hands and talked to her in his most soothing voice.

“There is no way back that I know of, Aqua.” He approached her slowly when she stopped walking. Her hands were shaking almost violently, and she hurled the journal away when she noticed she was still holding it, as if it had burned her. “Aqua, dear,” Richard called to her, “look at me. Dear, I’m afraid you can’t go back. But it’s going to be okay, you’ll be fine.” He ran to catch her when he saw her knees falter. He cradled her, rubbing her back as she hyperventilated.

Aqua’s face and fingertips felt tingly as her breathing evened. She hadn’t noticed before, but she now heard Richard’s loving, off-key voice singing very softly to her in Spanish, and felt their bodies rocking from side to side as he tried to calm her down. She listened intently to his heartbeat, willing her own to slow down. The sky changed colors, and a gray cloud obscured the last rays of sunshine. Thin droplets of cold rainwater concealed Aqua’s tears.

Though she didn’t want to, she believed Richard’s words; deep down, she knew that, for as long as she lived, she would never see her family again.


	10. Strong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning: Sexual assault mentioned

Richard didn’t know what to do. Aqua had gone numb, and she was not talking or eating or sleeping properly; she just sat on the sand, looking without seeing, and she didn’t cry once. He was worried that not crying would hurt her even more, but what could he do about it? She didn’t look at him when he approached her, she tensed up when he tried to touch her, and she wouldn’t take more than one bite of the food he brought her.

In the middle of the night, he had heard her screaming and tearing the journal apart, tossing the pages she had ripped off into the fire. Richard took the journal from her hands, for the information in it could be useful for his people; when he tried to comfort Aqua, she pushed him away and lay down far from the fire, breathing heavily. That was the only outburst of emotion she displayed in two days.

Richard started getting frustrated when he heard the metallic noise of the monster not far from their location, and Aqua didn’t even flinch. He knew she was broken, but he couldn’t understand her non-responsiveness.

The angry blue-eyed boy, Charles, and a small search party found them the second morning, worried because he hadn’t come back in almost two weeks. Richard took out his frustration on him, chastising him for doing something so unnecessary and sending him back to camp.

“The bomb is buried and safe, by the way,” Charles grumbled. Richard didn’t answer him with words but with a nod and a grunt. The boy was upset that he had come all the way to find him and keep him informed only to be received so coldly, and he was sure Richard acted in such a manner because of the intruder. “When are you coming back, then?” he asked him harshly, looking over his shoulder at the little nudnik on the sand.

“I don’t know yet,” Richard answered bitterly, forcing the boy to avert his eyes from Aqua. “But that’s none of your business, Widmore. Now turn around and go back where you came from.” He used his authoritative voice, looking Charles and the other two men in the eye.

“Yes, sir,” the boy answered sharply and left without another word. Richard sighed loudly when Widmore and the others were out of earshot; he truly didn’t know when he and Aqua would be getting back to his people. He was, nonetheless, willing to stay by Aqua’s side for as long as she needed him.

On the third morning of silence, Richard went for a walk. Aqua was still asleep; she had spent most of the night fighting with the beach, throwing rocks and branches around and kicking the sand, groaning furiously. She must be so tired, Richard thought; this was the longest she had slept for since finding out the truth.

Walking through the jungle, not far from Aqua, Richard tried to clear his head. How could he help her? Offering his support, that was all. Until she opened up to him, all he could do was to keep her company and silently let her know she was not alone. Yes, that would do.

“She’ll feel better soon enough,” a voice nearby said. Richard froze, surprised by the unexpected visitor.

“Will she?” Richard asked Jacob.

“She will. You’d be surprised by her inner strength. That’s the reason why I chose to bring her to the Island,” Jacob explained calmly. Like everyone else who came to the Island, she was handpicked by Jacob, of course. She seemed to have had such a happy life, though, that Richard wondered what exactly made her a candidate. “She won’t tell you if you ask her,” Jacob continued as if he had read Richard’s mind. “She keeps her secrets to herself. It would take you years to bring even one of them to the surface.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Richard asked him. He thought it was reasonable that Aqua wouldn’t want to talk about the painful past.

“I want you to understand her better, so you can help her heal. Do you want to know why I brought her here?” Jacob asked. It was tempting, but Richard knew it meant breaking her trust. He looked toward Aqua’s general direction ¾where she probably still slept, still suffered ¾ and his heart ached from the knowledge that he couldn’t help her.

“Fine,” he said after deliberating it for a few minutes. “But I don’t want to know too much. If she ever wants to tell me herself, I’ll let _her_ go into details.”

Jacob smiled.

“She had this one bully when she was a child,” Jacob started. “He was older than her, and he mocked her constantly. She tried to speak to her parents and teachers about him but was told that that’s what boys do. The harassing continued for years because she never dared telling anyone else about it out of fear that she’d be ridiculed even more.” Richard frowned. “When she was twelve, his bully was fourteen. At school one day, he cornered her behind the dumpsters in the yard, with two of his friends and… Well, I’ll let her get into details,” Jacob said. A million scenarios played in Richard’s mind, each worse than the other, infuriating him. “She had two abortions in the four years that the abuse lasted.” Richard felt sick, and he didn’t want to hear more, but he kept quiet. “She never said anything to anyone, and it isolated her completely, making her an even easier target. She fell behind in school. It wasn’t until her… rapist targeted her little sister that she decided to act.”

“Kay?” Richard interrupted Jacob. He remembered the chubby girl the monster had pretended to be, and how fiercely Aqua had tried to defend her from him.

“Yes, Kay. She went to Aqua, crying, and told her what he had done to her. So the next day during lunch, Aqua marched towards him, hands in fists, and without uttering a single word, she knocked him to the ground and punched him with all her strength. She did so much damage to him; he wore spectacles, and he’s now partially blind from the glass pieces that tore his corneas.” He paused, letting Richard imagine the scene. “He dared press charges against her. But she counterattacked, unwilling to be ridiculed once more. It turned out that there were more victims to his acts. The charges against Aqua were dropped, and that monster is serving ten years in a federal prison,” Jacob concluded.

Richard was speechless. He was angry at the monster, proud of her for her strength, and sad that she had to carry such a weight on her thin shoulders. He remained in silence while he thought over Aqua’s story, conscious that Jacob had revealed too much despite his petition.

“There’s something I don’t understand, though,” he said, visualizing Aqua’s broken expression when she realized her family was dead in the future. “Why did you bring her to the past? She’s not from this time; why is she here?”

“Because that meant she would meet you,” Jacob answered warmly. Once again, Richard looked in Aqua’s direction longingly. When he turned back, Jacob was gone. 

* * *

 

Back in their cove, Richard was surprised to see Aqua awake and gutting the biggest fish she had caught so far. She pulled the gills with too much strength, with anger almost. He watched her from afar as she scaled the fish, not wanting to interrupt her ritual.

It was as if he were seeing her for the first time. A new, brilliant light shone over her, revealing her inner strength and beauty. She was no longer the scared, lost girl who had sassed him that first day. Under this new light, she turned into a strong, resilient young woman who, despite everything, was full of love. Richard could see that massive, growing weight Aqua carried on her shoulders, but he knew now that it was not enough to crush her down.

Aqua turned her beautiful face towards Richard, giving him the faintest smile. Something stirred inside him, and he smiled back, ready to carry her burden with her. He approached her slowly, her eyes sparkling as her smiled widened. He kissed Aqua’s forehead, and for the first time in so long, Richard was ready to fall in love again.


	11. Sea Turtles

Richard was not around, which made Aqua panic a little. He had to be back soon, she thought, because he hadn't taken the rifle, only his water canteen. She was hungry, though, and there was no food. The ocean seemed to be calling her, teasing her, daring her to attack it. She had grown tired of the nothingness inside her, so she let whatever desire came first to overtake her. That desire was hunger, so she took Richard's spear and walked towards the water with increasing determination. Fishing, she discovered, was so satisfying that it made her feel something again. When she finally caught a fish –the biggest she had ever caught– she felt the release of endorphins the activity had caused; she gutted it and scaled it with fierceness, taking out all her anger and sadness on the fish. It felt good, to move, to do something; she could see herself hunting and fishing and running and healing at the same time.

Aqua felt the unmistakable tingling sensation of being observed, and she turned to see Richard at the tree line. There was something in his face, but she couldn't decipher what it was; she gave him a little smile, wondering, absurdly, if it was love what colored his handsome features. He smiled too and approached her, which made her heart beat faster and louder, and her smile to widen unconsciously. He kissed her forehead, a deliberate and unexpected act that made Aqua gasp. Richard chuckled softly, not mockingly or condescendingly, but as if he were surprised by his own acts. The fish started to slip from Aqua's hands, and she caught it before the tide took it, giggling as well, flustered.

Richard gave her space, while at the same time managing to stay at touching distance from her. They spent the day in comfortable silence. Richard never averted his caring gaze from Aqua's blushed face; he was looking at her with awe, which made Aqua wondered what had triggered this change in him. At night they sat side by side, watching the stars that shined through the fading gray clouds together. They fell asleep holding hands.

* * *

"Richard. Richard, wake up. Richard, come look at this," Aqua was whispering. They had slept for so long that it was almost noon, and the sun shined bright and warm. Richard slowly opened his eyes, fluttering his dark eyelashes as he adjusted to the light.

"What is it?" he groggily asked.

"You  _have_  to see this," Aqua said with a smile so brilliant it dazzled Richard more than the sun had. She took his hand and pulled him up, giving him time to stretch. "Come, quick!" she urged him, almost dragging him by the hand.

She took him a few yards away from their bonfire; she had made a path of sand mounds and branches that led to the ocean. They knelt next to a little patch of sand that seemed to be trembling from underneath. Just as they arrived, the smallest creature emerged from the sand, followed closely by its siblings. Aqua gasped as the tiny sea turtles made their way out of their nest, with a delighted smile on her face and sparkling eyes. Richard had seen turtles hatching before, so instead he focused on Aqua's blissful face, which to him was the most marvelous event taking place. One by one, the baby turtles found their way to the sea, guided by the path Aqua had made for them. She got up quickly to scare away the preying birds; she guarded the turtles ferociously, making sure that every single one of them made it home. She went back to the nest to welcome the last turtles into the world, asking Richard to take her place as the turtles' guard. They were so small, and they moved so fast! In only a few minutes, there was only one left; the little creature tried to get out of the hole but felt onto its back. Aqua gasped, worried, and she very gently took it in her hands, placing it in the path and walking along with it as it rushed to the sea. She waved them goodbye as they swam in the clear, blue waters, hoping fervently that they would all survive.

"I wish I could take care of them in the sea, too," Aqua said wistfully. Richard didn't say anything, but she could feel his intense gaze fixated on her. The ocean was suddenly very interesting, captivating Aqua's attention completely; she didn't want look back at Richard. Her breathing and heartbeat accelerated; she knew that if they looked into each other's eyes, they would kiss, and she wasn't feeling ready for that yet.

Instead, she raced him to the bonfire, where she was already cooking the three fish she had fished. Richard expressed his pride at what a skilled fisher she was becoming.

"Soon you'll master spear-hunting, too," he said with a smile.

"I'm no spear-fishing master, though," she waved him off, shrugging. Nonetheless, she couldn't deny that she craved mastering every physical activity the Island had to offer that would keep her mind busy. Every now and then a painful memory made it back to her, and she had to fight to not crumble down again.

After a nap and a second meal, it started to dawn on Aqua just how monotonous and repetitive life on a deserted island was. Every day was pretty much spent the same, and she wondered how Richard had managed to not lose his mind yet. She toyed again with the idea of going back to the outside world –even if the outside world was in the middle of the twentieth century– but she knew Richard would never leave his people to go with her, so she discarded it completely.

The crashing waves tempted her with their sonorous music. She hadn't swum just for fun in too long; it would be a great way to break the monotony and keep herself distracted. The sun was just starting to set, and the bright blue gave way to a palette of soft pastel colors; blue, pink, yellow, and orange painted the sky, contrasting with the sapphire blue of the ocean. The scene was so beautiful and tempting that Aqua didn't have to think twice about it. In a second she was up from her blanket and running towards the sea. Richard's gaze followed her; he was sitting right next to where she had been, fixing his bow.

Aqua had gotten used to not wearing shoes she still gagged when she remembered how she had gotten her boots yet she gasped in surprise when her feet touched the wet sand. It was such a pleasant sensation she had to pause to truly enjoy it. When the tide started burying her feet in the sand, she stripped off her clothes, ignoring the fact that Richard who was blushing at the scene but not looking away was right behind her. Wearing only her underwear, she submerged.

The lukewarm water received her with joy, rocking her slightly as she swam. She emerged from the water, elated, looking for Richard. His face was puzzled, but slowly he smiled back at Aqua's inviting smile. She waved at him to join her, wanting to share such a wonderful moment with such a wonderful man. He left the bow and his clothes with Aqua's and joined her. Half her face was underwater; he could only see her shiny hazel eyes and her long, dark hair floating around her face like a lily pad. He swam to where she was and was received by a squirt of water to the face. Aqua's sonorous, beautiful laugh filled the air.

It turned to a splashing contest, the winner of which Aqua declared herself. Richard then challenged her to hold her breath as long as she could, and she found herself defeated; Richard could hold his breath for a whole minute! They spent hours in childish games –which made both of them feel more alive than ever– as the witnessing sky saturated its colors and the sun made room for the moon in the firmament. When she miscalculated the distance from the shore and could no longer feel the ocean floor, Aqua decided it was time to go back to the beach. She was tired, though, and Richard obliged to tow her back.

"Never would've believed you were scared of the ocean," Richard taunted, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh, I'm not! I just really like to feel something beneath my feet!" Aqua said. She was now only hips-deep in the water. The wind had picked up, and the waves were moving more swiftly and vigorously, rocking them from side to side.

"Of course," he teased, splashing Aqua in the face. She gasped and splashed him back, resuming the splashing contest.

If someone were to be looking at them from afar, they'd see a painting of love, hear a melody of happiness. Against the red sky, their black silhouettes danced playfully in the dark sea, blissfully laughing in harmony. Splashing each other like infatuated teenagers, their hearts beat as one, thudding with the force of new love.

The strong waves and the games made Aqua lose her balance, making her fall in Richard's arms. Heat spread through their bodies from where their arms touched. The laughter died down slowly as they caught their breath. Unconsciously, their hands wandered across the other's skin, until Aqua's found Richard's neck, and Richard's found Aqua's waist. Their gazes were locked, blocking out everything that surrounded them, until there was only Aqua and Richard in the world. In a blink, their lips found each other with the pulling force of a magnet.


	12. Isabella

The crackling of the fire, the crashing of the waves, and Richard's fingers brushing through her damp hair made Aqua sleepy. It was dark now, and they had just eaten. Aqua was sitting with her arms around her legs and her head resting on her knees in between Richard's legs. Richard was very thoroughly and very gently combing her hair with his fingers. The silence was peaceful, and Aqua inevitably relived their kiss. It had been magical and perfect, and it would have gone on and on if it hadn't been for the wave that knocked them over. They got out of the sea holding hands and laughing like fools.

For the hour after that, Richard and Aqua had exchanged flustered smiles and shy looks. Aqua was truly taken by surprise, for Richard didn't look like the kind of man who blushed at all. After eating, they got to talking about everything and nothing at the same time but not once did they mention the kiss. It wasn't that they were pretending it hadn't happen, but they didn't know what to say.  _Hey, do you want to kiss again? Hey, do you want to be my girlfriend?_ Grown men like Richard didn't have  _girlfriends_ , Aqua thought. They had wives or partners or lovers. However, they were both silently acknowledging that it  _had_ happened and that it  _had_ meant something, and that they were now more than just… whatever they had been.

"Let me do it," Richard requested when Aqua started brushing her hair.

With eyes wide, she nodded and looked away from him. Richard placed himself behind her with his legs to each side, and gathered Aqua's hair in his hands, sending shivers down her spine.

That's where they were now. Aqua could feel Richard's breath on her neck, and every time his fingers accidentally brushed her skin, her breathing and heartbeat accelerated. With her eyes closed, Aqua thought of Richard and their kiss, and she fantasized about him unexpectedly kissing her neck. She quivered and felt her ears get hot.

She tried to think of something else. There were many things she could think about, most of which were unpleasant memories. It was hard to think of something that was not her family or her loneliness or the freaky fact that she had time-traveled. Everything was too painful or too strange to think or ask Richard about right now. Aqua decided that she had time the rest of her life, really to talk to Richard about all those things.

But she really didn't want to not talk to Richard, and she had gone too long without saying anything, and she was starting to feel unreasonably uncomfortable.  _Say something,_  she thought to herself.  _Remember something you wanted to ask him. Just remember. Remember… Remember Isabella, Richard. Who is Isabella?_ Though the memory of the moment when she had heard that name was painful, Aqua couldn't help but wondering. The Monster had mentioned an Isabella, and her name had made Richard tense up. The mystery behind her was captivating, so she decided to bring her up.

"Richard?" she started, a little hesitantly.

"Yes, dear?" Aqua could almost hear the smile in his voice.

"I, uh, I want to ouch!" she exclaimed when Richard's fingers got caught in a tangle.

"So sorry, dear. I promise I'm trying to do this as softly as I can."

"Don't worry. So, Richard," she tried to start again and then stopped. What if she didn't want to hear what Richard had to say about this Isabella? Aqua shook her head only to regret it immediately when she felt a tug to her scalp.

"What is it?" Richard asked her, noticing her hesitancy.

"Nothing," Aqua answered and mentally face-palmed. "No, not nothing. I want to ask you about something."

"Absolutely anything you want, dear." He would have to stop calling her 'dear' if he didn't want her to melt right there.

"Well… The Monster said something, and I'm curious…" Aqua took a deep breath. "Richard, who is Isabella?"

Richard's hands paused. Aqua's heart raced, thinking that maybe this topic of conversation would upset Richard.

"Isabella?" he repeated.

"Yes." She wished she hadn't spoken.

Despite Richard's surprise, his hands kept brushing her hair. Aqua relaxed a little bit.

"Are you sure you want to hear this story?"

 _No,_ Aqua thought. Now she didn't want to hear it because he had asked that question. It would probably not upset Richard, but it might upset her, and Richard knew it.  _But you can't just drop it now that you brought her up._

"Yes."

"Well…" Richard started. Aqua could almost hear him think, gathering the information to present it to her in a sensible way. This made her anxious. "Well, Aqua, Isabella was my wife."

Aqua stopped breathing. What had Richard just said? Another tug to her scalp. Did he say 'wife'? Did she hear him correctly? Oh, she shouldn't have asked about her, not tonight.

"Oh." She took a shaky breath through her nose. She tried to be nonchalant about it. "Okay. Cool. Your wife. Okay." She paused. Of course he had been married, of course. He was an attractive grown man, and she was just out of college. Of course he had been married. Of course. Made sense. He chuckled once, and Aqua wondered why this situation was funny.

"Yes. She  _was_  my wife," he emphasized. Alright. Sure. So that meant that they were no longer married, and that Richard was aware that it made Aqua feel weird, and that Isabella was not the center of his universe anymore, right?  _Right?_ Oh dear, was she back at his camp?

After she had spent a whole minute in silence, Richard rubbed her bare shoulder. She had to say something to show her maturity.

"How long were you married for?"

Richard sighed and groaned quietly, but Aqua still heard him. She really wished she hadn't opened her mouth. She realized that she didn't want to hear Richard talking about another woman, especially not about a woman he had been married to.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Aqua suggested, hoping that she wouldn't sound like it was her who didn't want to hear it.

"No, no, it's okay. You deserve to know."

Aqua thought that if Richard believed that she deserved to know about his ex-wife, then he was taking her seriously enough. He was almost done combing her hair.

"We were married for twelve years," he said, and his voice was nostalgic and full of love. Something stirred inside Aqua, and she couldn't help but frown.

"Really? That's a lot." She was trying really hard to sound like the adult she was.

"Yes." Richard chuckled once more. "It was a long time ago."

"You loved her a lot, I suppose." Aqua's voice was strained.

"Absolutely. She was the love of my life."

Hearing Richard talk about this Isabella woman like that made her weirdly angry. He was touching her hair so delicately while talking about the love of his life, and why? Why would he do that? He finished combing her hair, and he parted it in two, placing half of it over her left shoulder. He tried to braid the other half.

"What happened, then?" She knew the question had come out tactless.

"She passed away," he said calmly. Aqua's heart fell. Oh, no. Oh, dear Lord, she had been jealous of a dead woman. A  _dead_ woman. What kind of horrible person was she?

"I'm sorry," she blurted out, then turned around to face him. "Oh Richard, I am- I'm so sorry! That's horrible!"

Richard smiled softly at her mortified face, and then grabbed the left section of Aqua's hair, forcing her to face forward again. He began braiding once more.

"Thank you. It's alright. It was a long time ago."

They remained in silence, which had turned from comfortable to slightly awkward, as Richard finished the braid. She felt stupid. Aqua was incredibly ashamed, and she wished she could bury her head in the sand; but she also knew she had to say something.

"How long ago?"

"Long ago. Too long."

Too long? How long was too long? Aqua tried to analyze Richard's words, and something was kind of off. He had told her that he was thirty six. But if he had been married for twelve years, and Isabella was long gone, how old was he when he got married? She tried to do the math, but it didn't really add up, so she let it go.

"Oh." She felt Richard trying to wrap a strand of hair around the braid to secure it. "Can I… Can I ask how it happened?"

"Of course. She fell ill, and I failed to get her help in time," he explained, very straightforward.

Aqua let out a breath. There was something in Richard's voice that reminded her of herself, years ago when she used to blame herself for her misfortunes. She frowned again. Then she remembered the Monster, the Monster wearing her sister's face, and how it had taunted Richard with Isabella's death. Maybe he did blame himself for her death. She didn't dare ask him.

"Is there anything else you want to know?" Richard said when he was done securing the braids. It was hard to think of what to say or what to ask him. She had already asked about the dead wife, so what could be worse than that, right?

"Children," Aqua said out loud, though quietly. "Did you have children?"

"No." The sadness in Richard's voice was tangible. "We were unable to."

"I'm sorry." And she meant it.

"That's fine. We had each other, and we were very happy." He was gently scratching Aqua's back.

"Did you want kids?" She hated herself for asking these questions when Richard sighed deeply.

"Absolutely."

"Do you still want them?" The question came out as a whisper. Aqua thought of herself; herself in ten years, still on the Island with Richard. She thought of how terrified she was of pregnancy and motherhood, and how she didn't think she could give Richard a child. This last thought was slightly intrusive, for she hadn't truly admitted to herself that she wanted to be with Richard like that.

"In other circumstances," Richard interrupted her train of thought, "I would still want children." There was a long pause during which Aqua imagined the ideal circumstances in which to bring a child to this world. A time-traveling, deserted island haunted by a smoke monster in the 1950s was not one of those circumstances. "I've never said that to anyone. Or planned to say it to anyone"

Aqua nodded. She felt privileged; privileged to have Richard's trust. She wondered why the sudden intimacy had sprung between them. Was it because of the kiss? Was it because of the cover of the night? Was it because they were still half-dressed? Was it because–

Richard's lips were on her bare shoulder. He kissed her there once, then made his way up to her ear in five kisses. Aqua's breathing was almost too loud, too fast.

"There is something else you must know," Richard whispered in her ear.


	13. Far-Fetched

Richard opened his mouth to speak, but he was rendered speechless by Aqua's beauty. It was like he was seeing her for the very first time. He sighed, defeated, and looked down. He had moved from behind Aqua and now sat in front of her, with his legs bent on each side of her and his elbows resting on his knees.

"What are you doing to me?" he asked, too abashed to look at Aqua's face. Aqua cocked her head slightly and smiled. "I don't even recognize myself when I'm with you. And I mean that in the best of ways." Her smile widened, and Richard's heart beat faster than it had in years. He continued, "I am a different man when I am with you. You make me want to tell you every little secret I've ever had in my long life. You make me feel so young and carefree again. You transform me into a better version of myself that I never knew I could be."

Aqua's face when he finished talking was full of emotions that Richard couldn't accurately describe. She extended her legs and placed them over Richard's, to each side of him. Richard's eyes followed Aqua's right hand as she extended it, almost in slow motion, and placed it on his cheek. She gasped quietly and smiled when she felt his stubble, which he knew she liked. She rubbed his cheek with her thumb and smiled at his lips. He wanted to kiss her again.

But he owed it to her to tell her the truth before anything else happened.

"Do you miss her?" Aqua asked suddenly, her hand still on Richard's face. Richard frowned slightly in confusion. "Isabella, I mean." She had lowered her eyes.

Richard examined her face as he placed his hand over hers. He knew that the talk about Isabella had made her uncomfortable perhaps even upset and he didn't want her to feel worse. Yet he knew that hiding the truth from her would be detrimental to their relationship.

"Yes."

"Ah." She put her hand back on her lap.

"She was my only family, Aqua," Richard explained. "When she died, I was all alone."

"Yes, of course," Aqua said quickly. "I didn't mean… I know. Of course you miss her." She huffed. "I would actually think you were heartless if you didn't."

Richard laughed quietly in an attempt to lighten the mood. It worked, and a hint of a smile appeared on Aqua's rosy lips. He wanted desperately to kiss those lips. In the moonlight, Aqua looked beyond extraordinary. He tried once more to say what he had to say, but Aqua was just too ravishing. Instead, something else escaped his lips.

"For years, I have admired the stars and marveled at the moon, and none compares to you. You are radiant," he said. Aqua's eyes were big and bright. "Yes, I miss Isabella, and I always will, because she was all I had for so long. But you're here now. Turning my world upside-down. Changing everything I thought I knew, everything I thought I was. And I like that."

It only took a small pause from Richard for Aqua to wrap her arms around his neck and press her lips against his. He was taken by surprise, but he didn't waste a second and immediately embraced her at the waist. Their kiss from earlier was nothing compared to this one. The first one was shy and soft, while this one was intense and full of passion. Richard felt Aqua settling on his lap when he remembered what he had intended to tell her. It was hard, though, to stop. She was so close, skin to skin, and they were just in their underwear. This thought embarrassed him, yet it didn't stop him from running his hands up and down her bare back. Isabella completely left his mind for the first time in years.

Isabella.

Isabella was back and nagging him to tell Aqua the truth.  _She deserves it_ , he could almost hear her saying. Richard knew that, too. He tried to force himself to stop, but it really took a lot of effort. A few more minutes passed before he was strong-willed enough to pull away. It wasn't easy, though, because Aqua didn't want to. He had to hold her back so she wouldn't kiss him again.

She looked at him with a puzzled expression on her pretty face, her chest moving up and down with her agitated breathing. Richard smiled at her, breathing hard as well. Aqua smiled back, looking incredibly embarrassed and incredibly beautiful. She burst out laughing nervously, and it was a lovely sound. He laughed with her as she removed herself from his lap and returned back to her original place, pressing her knees to her chest.

"I think I interrupted you," she said, abashed.

"Oh, I can't complain," Richard responded. "Feel free to interrupt me anytime." He wished he hadn't said that. They couldn't keep making out before he told Aqua the full truth about himself.

"Oh, I will, and you'll have to stop me again."

"Maybe I'll have to stop myself first," Richard said, and again wished he hadn't. Aqua was tearing down his self-control, yet he didn't really mind it.

They sat there, giggling, catching their breaths for a couple of minutes. Richard tried to find a way to start his story in a sensible way. But what was a sensible way? Because truly, what had just happened? Had it been real? He wasn't sure, but it had been wonderful, and desire still floated in the air. He knew that his story would break the mood and maybe even make Aqua have another breakdown. Nevertheless, it was only fair to tell her now now that the conversation about Isabella had started if Aqua really was to stay with him on the island.

"What do you want to tell me, Richard?" Aqua asked, serious but still smiling. "I can see it in your face that it's something important. Is it something that I won't really like?"

Richard smiled at how smart and perceptive Aqua was, but it was a sad smile. She really wouldn't like it.

"Just tell me. The sooner you do, the sooner we can…" She left the sentence floating in the air and looked away, embarrassed.

Richard smiled at her once more. He could stare at her face for days on end, at her tiny freckles and her long eyelashes and her flushed cheeks. His heart or his brain or something inside him told him that Aqua was the only one that mattered now. Others could come and go, but if she stayed, Richard didn't need anyone else.

Because of this, he had to speak –now. He took a deep breath.

"Of course," he started. "You're right. I don't think you will like this very much." Aqua's face changed; Richard wished he didn't have to go on. "This island is very peculiar, you know that." She nodded. "And I've told you about Jacob. He is very peculiar as well. He protects this island, and I help him by working as a sort of link between him and the people who come here. But it takes longer than a lifetime to provide the help he needs."

Aqua's forehead wrinkled in confusion. She extended her legs again and started fidgeting with her left braid. She didn't say anything.

"I told you I was thirty-six. That's technically true." Richard spoke slowly, trying not to alter Aqua. She still looked confused. "The thing is… I've been thirty-six for a long time."

"I don't get it," Aqua said, almost like a question, after a long pause. "Do you just not celebrate your birthdays anymore? Are you actually older than you say you are?"

"Well, yes," answered Richard. She wasn't exactly wrong. "And no. I  _am_  thirty-six. Biologically. Chronologically, I'm much older."

Aqua snorted.

"What, are you a vampire?" The amusement in her face told him that she didn't believe it. But she hadn't believed that they were in 1954 either, and then it had completely broken her. Richard couldn't make her go through that again, but he had to.

"I'm not a vampire," he said seriously, but not as urgently as he had spoken before.

"Then what? I don't understand what you're trying to tell me."

"I know. I'm sorry I have to tell you this, Aqua, but you deserve to know. You'd find out eventually, anyway."

"Just say it, Richard." Aqua was getting exasperated, like before.

They stared at each other for a little while, while Richard gathered the courage to tell her the truth.

"I was born in 1831. Jacob made me immortal. I have been thirty-six for eighty-seven years." There. He had said it.

Aqua's pretty face remained unchanged for a few seconds. Then Richard's words started to sink in. Her features went from exasperated to confused to shocked to confused again. Then disbelief took over.

"I'm sorry, what? The time-traveling I can believe. Somehow. Because  _I_  experienced it. But you being immortal? Please. That's ludicrous, Richard," she said, and her voice sounded annoyed. It hurt Richard. He didn't know how to handle an annoyed Aqua without getting annoyed himself, but he tried, nonetheless.

"It's true," he said, plainly. Aqua rolled her eyes.

"Is this you making fun of me or something? Are you mocking me because I'm younger than you?" she asked, irritated. "Because I have no self-control and I jump at you the second you say something nice?"

Aqua sounded furious, and her comment made no sense to Richard. Is that what she believed Richard thought of her?

"Of course not, Aqua–"

"Then what kind of nonsense is this?!"

She wouldn't believe him, Richard was sure of that. How could he make her believe him? By proving his words, of course.

"Aqua, I'm not lying to you. Let alone mock you. Look, I cannot kill myself or hurt myself. It's part of Jacob's deal." He raised a hand to stop Aqua's protest, and then placed that same hand in the fire.

"Richard!" she exclaimed, alarmed.

But when Richard removed his hand, it came out unharmed. Aqua's mouth opened in shock.

"How did you do that?" she asked in a whisper.

"Told you. Immortal."

Her hazel eyes traveled from Richard's hand to the fire to his face and to his hand again. Acceptance colored her face. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad, after all.

"You're not lying then?" Her voice was still low.

"No, Aqua," Richard said. "I would never lie to you."

They remained in silence for a while as Aqua processed this new information. Richard watched her carefully, hoping she wouldn't break down again. When she looked back at him, there was something strange in her eyes that Richard couldn't name.

"You're telling me the truth, then? This Jacob person… What is he?"

"I'm not sure myself," he answered sincerely.

"Why?" she asked, but Richard wasn't sure exactly what she was referring to. "I mean… Why you? Is everyone else immortal, too?"

"No. Just me."

"Why?" Aqua asked again. "Who are you?" There was something in that question –the way she asked it, perhaps– that hurt Richard. "I mean, really. You protect this place. You're your people's leader, but not really. You speak Spanish." She made a small pause. "You're immortal. You're a mass-murderer.  _What_  are you?"

Richard didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say. Aqua was laying down these facts about him like accusations. The love that had been in her voice just fifteen minutes before was completely gone. Something that Richard couldn't describe –but that he disliked– had taken over.

"Where do you come from? Why did this Jacob make you immortal? Tell me," Aqua demanded.

Richard complied. He told her his full story. About Tenerife, Isabella's death, the doctor, the slave ship. About how the Monster had tricked him, using Isabella's face like it had used Kay's. How Jacob had convinced him that he wasn't in hell. How and why he requested Jacob to live forever. How he had helped the dozens of people that had arrived to the island throughout the decades.

Aqua's face shifted ever so slightly as Richard told his story. However, it was clear that she believed him, and this was a relief.

"There you have it," Richard concluded. Aqua remained in silence for a minute or two more, processing his story.

"Okay," she finally said. "Okay."

"You believe me?"

"Yes."

Richard felt like he could breathe again. He had feared that such a far-fetched story as his would cause her even more stress. But she believed him, so everything was okay.

He reached up to touch her face, but she jerked away. This shocked Richard. He frowned, and watched, confused, as Aqua folded her legs. He tried to touch her hand, but she jolted it back.

"What is it?" he asked flatly.

Aqua wouldn't look him in the eyes. She shook her head, but Richard wasn't sure if it was more to herself than to him. She exhaled and bit her bottom lip.

"I can't. This is… strange," she said, not really clearing it up for Richard. She noticed his confusion and said, "Look, I was okay with  _this_  –loved  _this_ , really– when I thought you were just thirty-six. But you just told me that you're not. That you're a hundred and twenty-three years old." Richard's frown deepened. Aqua looked exasperated again. "I'm  _twenty-three_. Hell, we're not even from the same century!" Was there aversion in her voice? "I just can't. I don't think I feel comfortable enough to do this."

Richard's heart fell. What was happening? Everything was going so well. He didn't know what to say.

"Aqua, I–"

"Yeah, I know. I like you, Richard, a lot. I may even …" She shrugged. "But I don't think I can do this."

They just stared at each other for a minute. Richard's head was fuzzy. Everything was supposed to be going fine. Aqua wasn't supposed to have a breakdown. What was going on? Richard was breathing fast, beyond confused now, something he hadn't been for decades.

Without another word, Aqua moved away from Richard and lay down on the other side of the fire.

Seven years would pass before Richard could kiss Aqua again.


	14. Moments

Richard's people were not happy. Richard had been gone for too long without a convincing explanation of why. From their point of view, he had abandoned them in their dangerous task of burying a bomb to find some girl's family. And then, he had had the nerve to come back to camp with said girl. He didn't give Ellie any explanation whatsoever, which irritated her; he had just come back as if he hadn't left. Richard only told his people that Aqua would be staying with them permanently. Most of his people didn't even acknowledge Aqua, while the rest only groaned. They really couldn't care less about the intruder.

This made Aqua feel completely alienated. She was all alone now, no family, no friends. She had thought before, while in the cove, that she'd be okay if she only had Richard for a while, that new friends would come. But now that she had ended things –whatever things were going on– with Richard, she didn't have any hope anymore.

The trek back to the plateau had happened in complete silence. Richard didn't say anything to Aqua; he only communicated with hand gestures and grunts. Aqua didn't know what to say to him. She knew she had screwed things up between the two of them, but she didn't really regret her decision. She really believed that being with Richard, considering all that he was, was weird. Weird was the only way she could describe it. Aqua could only hope that Richard would forgive her soon so that they could be friends again.

Richard was very angry, and Aqua didn't need him to use words to know. Once she had been introduced to Richard's people, Richard proceeded to assign her a place to live. He put her with Ellie. He knew that she didn't like Ellie, and Aqua was sure that Richard had done it on purpose. Ellie was livid.

Aqua cried every night for weeks.

* * *

"Aqua," Richard's voice behind her called. She froze. It had been months since he had last spoken directly to her. Slowly, she turned to him; she was on her way to gather fruit.

Richard avoided her eyes.

"Yes?" she asked.

He hesitated. Here, barely concealed by the trees, Richard looked different. He looked like her Richard. No. She didn't have the right to call him  _her Richard_. But he did look like the man she had… developed feelings for. His face looked almost vulnerable now, having lost the tough façade it wore every day.

Struggling, Richard managed to look Aqua in the eye. He broke her heart. His eyes were full of sorrow and longing. This time, Aqua was the one who had to look away in shame.

In the silence that followed, Aqua remembered the days when not a word was needed between her and Richard. Now, though, the silence was so tense, she could feel like she could cut it with a knife.

From time to time, she remembered those weeks alone with Richard. It annoyed her, because she knew that it was unfair of her. She wasn't allowed to feel… sad, not about something that  _she_ had ended, but that strange sadness still crept in. Oh, if that's how she felt from time to time, how did Richard feel every day? She hated thinking about that.

So, she had to stick to her decision and keep herself distant from Richard.

"Yes, Richard?" she asked again to break the silence. She wished she hadn't used his name, because he winced, like he was in physical pain.

"Nothing." He swallowed. "Never mind." He walked away. But after a few steps, he stopped, slightly turned his face, and simply said, "Happy birthday."

Oh. Aqua herself hadn't even remembered her birthday; nobody had. And there he was, Richard, the one person who was entitled to not remember her birthday at all, remembering it.

Shame rose up in her again.

* * *

Ellie, Aqua found out, was a great friend. Yes, it took Ellie weeks to stop looking at Aqua like she was vermin, but once she did, Aqua was glad to finally have someone to talk to, especially another girl. Ellie almost reminded Aqua of her older sister, Aria. It made her both happy and sad.

As forced roommates, Ellie and Aqua now got along. Surprisingly, it had been Ellie who had broken the ice and talked to Aqua first, about five or six weeks after Aqua arrived.

"What is the deal between you and Richard?" Ellie asked one night. Aqua was already settled in for bed, and she had to take a couple of seconds to realize that Ellie was speaking to her.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Widmore said that Richard was 'too protective' of you back in that beach," Ellie explained. Aqua wondered how Widmore knew this. "But now, he won't even look at you. It's like you don't exist to him. It makes no sense. What did you do to him?"

"I'm sorry?" Aqua said, defensively. Ellie's last question was too accusing.

"He seems different. And I know it has something to do with you. He's my family, Aqua, and I don't like seeing him hurt like this." Ellie's arms were crossed over her chest, and she was frowning, nostrils flaring.

Aqua had to yield. She could see it in Ellie's eyes that Richard's pain hurt her, too. If she was to have any friends at all, Aqua had to be honest. She sat up and sighed.

"I broke his heart, Ellie," Aqua confessed, and Ellie seemed taken aback; she probably wasn't expecting to get an explanation out of Aqua so easily. Ellie blinked, but said nothing. "I got freaked out by his immortality and decided that I didn't want to be with him. That's all."

Ellie's frown settled even deeper, and she looked older than she was. Aqua could swear Ellie was about to slap her across the face.

"That is the stupidest thing anyone has ever said to me," was all Ellie said. Aqua didn't have a response to that. Ellie continued, "So it is just because he's chronologically old? Because his mind is not old. His body is not old. He is just… frozen in time. Thirty-six forever. Is that not everyone's dream, to be young forever? I don't see why that constitutes grounds for you to break his heart."

"I don't know, Ellie. It seemed like the only choice I had then. I don't know. It's hard to explain. Although, frankly? I don't owe you an explanation." Aqua was getting defensive again.

"Perhaps. But you owe it to Richard."

Aqua hated to admit that Ellie was right.

"Trust me, I know. But it's just too late now. It wouldn't be fair."

Ellie rolled her eyes.

"Did you love him?" Ellie asked out of the blue.

"I– I don't know. I guess. Yes," Aqua stuttered. She hadn't admitted it out loud. Or admitted it at all, really. She wished Ellie would just slap her.

"Good. Because he loved you, too. Still does. If you two love each other, you should be together."

The conversation had taken such an unexpected turn that Aqua was speechless. She never would have imagined that Ellie would say such a thing to her.

"It really wouldn't be fair, Ellie. It would be a jerk move to go back to him after I rejected him so harshly. Besides…" Aqua told Ellie one of the things she had been thinking about to convince herself that she had made the right choice, "I'll grow old and die. I couldn't do that to him."

Ellie seemed to understand this; she must have had thought about it before, because she slowly nodded in acceptance.

And that was the end of it. Ellie didn't question Aqua again, though she was very against her decision. She thought it was dumb, and every now and then, she would tell Aqua that she and Richard should be together. But they were just comments; she never tried to change Aqua's mind. Aqua appreciated it, and with time, she learned to respect Ellie as her leader and to love her almost as much as she loved her own sisters.

The feeling was mutual. Ellie didn't really have female friends, and she was happy to have Aqua to talk to about the one thing she couldn't just talk about with anyone –boys. Ellie had a huge crush on Charles Widmore, but she was afraid that displaying her feelings would make her appear weak.

"That's ridiculous, Elle," Aqua told Ellie when she confessed her feelings to her.

"No, it's not," Ellie said seriously. "I'm the leader. I can't look weak."

"Did you know that having feelings is a completely normal thing for a human being?" Aqua said. Ellie rolled her eyes. "C'mon, Eloise. You're pretty; anyone can see that. I bet Charles does." Ellie blushed, then frowned. "No one expects you to be made of rock. Allow yourself to open your heart to this boy. It won't make you any less tough."

"I guess," Ellie sighed. "I just don't… do feelings. I don't know how. I've never felt like this for anyone before."

"Hey, I have. I'll help you out. That's what friends are for," Aqua said. "Don't you worry; we'll have Charles at your feet in no time."

It almost happened like that. It took almost two years for Charles and Ellie to finally get together. It was like a tug-o'-war with them; when one was ready to take the first step, the other would run away. But when they finally kissed in front of everyone one afternoon after a heated argument –they were that kind of people and love is complicated– Aqua took pride in knowing that she had pretty much made it happen.

Aqua knew, though, when he saw Richard's face that afternoon, that he still wished that the two of them could kiss again.

* * *

Aqua had friends. After four years on the island, pretty much everyone liked her. Those who didn't like her tolerated her at the very least. It was really miserable to not like someone when you lived on an island in the middle of nowhere with just a handful of people.

She had mastered everything. Richard didn't want to teach her, but he had asked others to teach Aqua how to do everything. She learned to hunt, to skin, to gut; she mastered the spear, the bow, the nets; she never stopped learning until she could do it backwards with her eyes closed. It really helped on those days when the sadness would hit her hard.

When Richard started talking to her again, he told her how proud he was of her accomplishments. Aqua smiled at him, said thank you, and saw it in his eyes that he was getting better. His heart was almost healed, and that made her happy. It never stopped being strange, though, to see Richard not aging like everyone else, including herself.

Aqua was now older than her sister Gaia would ever be. She cried the whole day when this realization hit her. That was the day she met Warren. Of course, they already knew each other for years, but they never really talked. Warren was a couple of years older than her. He had glowing dark black skin and fantastic, puffy hair, that he kept tamed in a high ponytail. He was as tall as Richard, but much more brawny. Warren's eyes were also dark, but they didn't carry such a long past.

"Are you okay?" Warren startled Aqua that day.

She had been crying, sitting against a tree, her head on her knees. At first she thought the voice was Richard's. She was embarrassed when she discovered it was actually Warren, not because she was ashamed of crying, but because he was pretty much a stranger to her. She didn't answer and looked away.

But Warren didn't leave. Instead, he sat next to her, reclining against the tree. Aqua wanted to get away, but she didn't have the energy.

"Have I ever told you the story of how a baby bird imprinted on me? It thought I was its mother for weeks." And he proceeded to tell the story. He managed to make Aqua laugh, which she was grateful for.

Warren dried Aqua's tears and walked her back to camp. And Aqua stopped feeling lonely.

* * *

It had been hard for Richard to see Warren and Aqua together for the first time. Her puffy eyes looked at Warren the way they used to look at him. He knew that he should be glad that she had found someone who would make her feel less lonely. He also knew that he should be over it already. It had been years since Aqua's rejection. But when you're immortal, years tend to feel like weeks. Though he was getting better, seeing Aqua and Warren holding hands, hugging, kissing, living together, was almost too much.

So he left. He told Ellie and Charles that he wanted to be on his own for a while. They were both grown up now, so they would be alright without him. He left at the break of dawn one morning, without saying goodbye to anyone.

* * *

"Ellie, I haven't seen Richard all day. Do you know where he is?" Aqua asked her old roommate. Ellie's face was apologetic, and a pang of fear engulfed Aqua.

"I should've told you. He left."

"What?" Aqua's heart fell, and she wasn't sure why. "Why? Where– Where did he go?"

"He said he wanted to be alone for some time. I'm not sure where he went. I'm sorry." Ellie gave her best friend a sad smile.

Aqua walked away without another word. She wasn't sure why this news made her so sad. She didn't love Richard anymore.

Did she?

Of course she didn't. She had Warren now.

But still. She wished Richard had said something to her. They were friends; why would he leave her like that? He couldn't be far, of course; they were on an island, after all. Could she maybe go find him? Would it be fair? Is that what Richard wanted?

So many unanswered questions. In the end, Aqua didn't go out looking for Richard. She stayed in camp, with Warren.

But when Richard returned, injured and covered in dried blood, Aqua's heart was his, and his only.


	15. Idiot

It was bonfire night. Once every couple of weeks, the community had this huge bonfire in the middle of camp, where they ate and talked and laughed. It was barely dusk, and the boar was just starting to roast in the fire. Richard had been away for a year and a half, but people still talked of him like he had left yesterday. Occasionally, someone hunting too far even ran into him. So, it wasn't much of a shocker when they saw him stumble into camp.

"Richard! It's Richard!" Aqua heard the others say. She perked up too fast, faster than she should have, considering that she was in Warren's arms. She couldn't see Richard, for he was coming from the other side of the fire.

"Richard!" Ellie's voice was full of alarm.

Aqua immediately stood up, desperately looking for Richard. She spotted him just as he fell to the ground. This didn't make sense. Was it really Richard? What had happened to him? Aqua wanted to run to him, but she was frozen in place. Others did run, though, but she barely noticed them.

It was a strange feeling. She hadn't known she missed Richard that much until she saw him again. Aqua realized now that Richard leaving was like having a part of her missing. She felt complete now, though broken. Because there was something wrong with Richard. He was not moving.

Aqua saw as Warren and Charles lifted Richard up and took him to his former tent. She was breathing hard, and her vision blurred. She blinked, and she was crying. Why are you crying? Aqua? Are you alright?

She had to blink some more to realize that Selma was talking to her. Worry painted Selma's face, and she had her hand gently on Aqua's shoulder. Aqua wanted to tell her that she was fine, but words wouldn't come out of her lips. She couldn't even nod. She was paralyzed, and the shadow of Richard's inert body danced around in her eyes. Her brain went fuzzy, and she crumbled down. She felt broken; sure,  _sure,_ that Richard was dead. There was no other explanation.

Aqua didn't know how long she had been crying on the ground in Selma's arms when suddenly she was in Warren's arms. Selma loved Aqua, but she wasn't used to dealing with other people's emotions. She gladly passed Aqua to Warren and went to figure out what was going on by herself. Warren stroked her hair and whispered soothing words in her ear.

"Don't cry, honey. He's fine. He's alive. Richard's alive. He will be okay."

When Aqua registered Warren's words, she couldn't help but think that she didn't deserve him. Warren knew what had happened between Richard and Aqua, yet here he was, comforting her while she cried for another man.

The boar burned. Ellie came out of Richard's tent, her hands slightly bloody, and went straight to Aqua. Aqua had stopped crying, but she couldn't erase the vision of Richard tumbling down. Ellie kneeled down in front of her best friend, and she looked so grown up. Where was that angry teenage girl who had aimed her rifle at Aqua?

Aqua wanted to ask Ellie if Richard was dead, but she still couldn't speak. Ellie understood; she knew her too well.

"He's alive. Aqua, do you hear me? Richard is alive." Ellie had her hand on Aqua's cheek, and she nodded along with her words. "He's unconscious. He's wounded, but he won't die. I think we should all go to bed, and you can see him tomorrow morning, yes?" Aqua shook her head. "Yes, Aqua. Let him rest. Warren, why don't you take Aqua home?"

Aqua shook her head again but didn't protest when Warren scooped her up and took her to their tent. He gently laid her down on their cot, removed her shoes, and wiped her face. She was a grown woman now, but being tenderly cared for like this was always welcomed. Warren lay down with her, and she fell asleep in his arms, deep down, very secretly wishing they were Richard's.

* * *

When Aqua woke up again, it was at that moment of the night when everything is silent. The birds, the insects, the wind, everything was quiet. Warren had turned over and had his back to her, as he often did when he got too hot. It was perfect, because when Aqua got up, he didn't even notice.

Aqua tiptoed to Richard's tent, where old Peter, the medic, slept on a chair in a corner. She knew he wouldn't wake up. Aqua kneeled down at Richard's bedside. Illuminated by candlelight, he looked as handsome as ever and not a day older. Something in her chest stirred, and she couldn't help but tear up. He was here, next to her again! His hair was longer, and his beard was bushy. Aqua liked this almost raggedy look on him. He was bandaged all over: his head, his chest, his left leg, but he didn't look beyond repair. Ellie was right; Richard would be fine in no time. Tentatively, Aqua stretched her hand and gently stroke his face and hair. He stirred but didn't wake.

Aqua spent the night by Richard's side.

* * *

"Honey, wake up," a male voice was saying. Aqua –still half asleep– smiled, happy to hear Richard's voice again. But when she opened her eyes, it wasn't Richard but Warren who was stroking her arm. Her face went red in shame. Warren offered her his hand, and Aqua helped herself up. Her muscles and joints were sore because of the position she had slept in.

Ellie was looking at her from behind Warren with an eyebrow raised and a judgmental expression; Aqua ignored her. Old Peter wasn't in the tent. Richard was still unconscious, or perhaps just sleeping, but he looked better than the night before. His peaceful face reassured Aqua, and she gladly went outside with Warren.

"Got a little panicked when you weren't there this morning," Warren told Aqua after breakfast.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

"It's fine. I understand why you were in his tent," he said with a shrug. Warren was not one to get jealous, and he had never really had a reason to.

"And why is that?" Aqua asked, trying to be nonchalant.

"Well," he shrugged again, "he's the first person you met when you got here. He was there for you when you found out about your family. He's your friend." What had she done to deserve Warren? Aqua's ears were hot. "You don't have to say anything else, honey. I understand. Well, it's my turn to hunt. See you later, love." He kissed her forehead and left.

As soon as Warren was out of their tent, a sudden urge to run to Richard flooded Aqua. She resisted it for as long as she could, but ultimately went to him once more. He was awake now and was talking to Ellie. He still looked convalescent, but as soon as his eyes found Aqua, his whole face brightened up. Aqua couldn't help but smile back at him.

"Oh, if it isn't  _Warren's girlfriend_ ," Ellie quipped. Aqua wished she could slap her. "Well, I'll leave you two alone. I'm sure you need to catch up." She gave Aqua a warning smile before exiting the tent.

Once alone with Richard, Aqua didn't know what to say. Why had she come here? She shouldn't have. Nevertheless, she couldn't leave. She was too scared that he would disappear from her sight again.

"Look at you," Richard broke the silence. "Thirty suits you." Aqua blushed.

"And you've looked better," she said. Richard smiled that swooning smile of his. "Oh, Richard. What happened to you?"

"It's nice to hear you say my name again." Richard still had ways to make Aqua melt.

"I've missed you." The words escaped Aqua's lips before she could stop them. Richard looked away apologetically. "You left without telling me. I thought I was your friend."

"You are. Of course you are. I'm sorry," Richard said meaningfully. "But it was too painful to stay here."

Aqua's heart broke. Of course, of course! She wasn't being fair to him. Not then, not now, not ever.

"The smoke monster," Richard said. "That's what happened to me."

Aqua kneeled down next to him, alarmed.

"What? Oh, Richard!"

"Don't worry. It wasn't the first time, and it certainly won't be the last one, I'm sure." He dismissed it like he wasn't lying in bed covered in bandages. "Really, don't worry. I've missed you, too, Aqua."

Aqua wished Richard hadn't said her name. Her name in his lips, his warm breath on her face, his handsome face finally home. It was too much. His voice was musical, too enchanting. Suddenly, Aqua was twenty-three again. She was twenty-three and alone. She was twenty-three and the tropical air of their cove was blowing in her face. She was twenty-three and Richard was singing to her.

Who knew that real love didn't go away?

Without thinking, Aqua closed the space that separated her from Richard and kissed him. His lips on hers, his rough hand on her face, his long hair tickling her forehead, everything,  _everything_  mended the hole that had been missing in her heart for eighteen months.

It was as if not a day had passed. Aqua could almost hear the waves and the birds from their cove in that kiss. She felt just as she had seven years ago, in the water, when she and Richard first kissed. Warren who? It was Richard, and Richard only, who flooded her head and her heart. Richard's smile, Richard's voice, Richard's laugh, Richard's body. Richard was everything.

But the spell broke when Aqua moved away. For five short seconds when she looked into Richard's dark, beautiful eyes, there was not a doubt in her mind. She wanted Richard. But the sounds of people outside the tent brought her back to reality, and she realized what she had just done. Richard looked slightly confused, but the hint of a smile danced in his lips.

No, this was all wrong. She shouldn't have kissed him.

"Aqua," Richard said, gently caressing her cheek, reading her expression.

"I should go," Aqua said hoarsely. She all but ran to her tent, where she screamed into her pillow and relived every moment she had ever spent with Richard.

* * *

For two weeks, Aqua managed to avoid Richard and Ellie. She spun around on her heels when she saw either of them; she pretended to go deaf when either spoke to her; she even claimed to be sick on bonfire night so she didn't have to see them. She knew that Ellie knew. Ellie always knew.

But she couldn't avoid Warren. Aqua spent every day and every night with Warren, but for fourteen days, she couldn't look him in the eye once. She felt terrible about kissing Richard, because she was so in love with Warren. Or at least she thought she was. It was impossible, though, to deny that Warren loved her more than anything in the world.

This kept Aqua up at night. The guilt, the shame. On the fourteenth night, she had a contrite expression on her face, and Warren spoke to her.

"What are you thinking about?" he startled her.

"Nothing," she answered, too quickly.

"You sure? You don't look like you're thinking about nothing."

"I'm sure. I just… can't sleep. That's all."

"Oh." Warren made a pause. "You know you can tell me anything, don't you?"

Well, damn. Did Warren know? He couldn't, Aqua thought. Or could he? Aqua tried to play it cool.

"Only that I love you." That wasn't probably the best answer, because she doubted the veracity of it.

"Oh. Well, I love you, too. A lot, Aqua." The tone of his voice was too deliberate, too knowing. He hugged her tight and kissed her face, and this didn't help Aqua's anxiety. She bit her lip to avoid crying, and she eventually fell asleep with a broken heart.

The next day, when Warren was out and Aqua was getting dressed, Ellie burst into Aqua's tent, ready to get some answers.

"What the hell?" Ellie exclaimed. Maybe Aqua could shove her aside and run away…

"Hey, Elle."

"What the hell?" Ellie repeated. She was standing in the doorway, arms crossed, and she looked so imposing. There was no way Aqua could get away from her.

"Yes, Ellie?" Aqua tried to sound innocent.

"Richard told me."

Oh, no.

"Told you what?" Aqua asked, playing dumb.

"Oh, you know exactly what." Ellie's eyes were so accusing that Aqua would actually prefer to be slapped. Aqua sighed, defeated, and slumped down on her cot. "Why the hell did you kiss him?"

"I don't know, Ellie."

"Oh, yes, you do know." Aqua could swear that her mother's spirit had taken over Ellie. "What is wrong with you, Aqua?"

"Look, I–"

"No, be quiet until I finish scolding you." Aqua couldn't believe that a twenty-four year old was chastising her, but she accepted it. "How dare you kiss Richard? After everything you put him through? That's selfish, Aqua. You broke his heart without even telling him why, and you think you can just kiss him like nothing ever happened?

"You can't pretend like you're back in your little love beach. You're not. You're here, in a relationship, and Richard was already getting over you. You can't go around kissing him when it's convenient for you and messing up with his head. He's so confused, Aqua! He doesn't know how to feel anymore, because he wants you, but he can't have you because you're with Warren.

"And that's another thing. You cheated on Warren, Aqua. Warren! Who has given you everything and who has loved you to death! You're not just hurting one person, Aqua, you're hurting two of them. Two wonderful men who love you."

Aqua tried really hard not to cry. She knew Ellie was absolutely right, and she had already thought about all of it before. She knew she was a horrible person, but she didn't know what to do.

"Well?" Ellie asked. "Do you have anything to say in your defense?"

"No," Aqua answered in a whisper. "No, I don't. I agree with everything you said, Ellie. But I don't know what I should do."

Ellie glared at her a little longer, then sighed and relaxed her muscles. She sat down with Aqua, wisdom and maturity and anger in her blue eyes.

"I'll tell you what you should do. You should cut the crap and make up your mind. Stop hurting them both, and just choose. Warren or Richard. I'd rather you break the heart of one of them than have you making bad choices that will hurt all of you."

"I don't want to break anyone's heart," Aqua sighed.

"Yeah, well, too bad. You already broke Richard's. Keep on going like this and you'll break Warren's and your own." When had Ellie become an expert in relationships? "So, choose, Aqua. It's an order."

"Fine." Aqua sighed deeply. "If only the three of us could have a polyamorous relationship. It would make everything so much easier," she said to herself.

"Is that another one of your words from the future?" Ellie asked, and Aqua nodded. "Well, whatever it means, don't. You can't have them both. It's selfish. And I doubt they would want that."

Aqua smiled at her. She loved Ellie so much. Only a true best friend, a sister, could slap you with words that hurt but don't sting because they're true. She was so grateful for Ellie, but she wished she didn't have to do what Ellie had ordered her to.

"Oh," Ellie said, like she had just remembered, "and you will tell Warren that you kissed Richard. Who knows? Maybe he'll break up with you and make your choice easier."

"Ellie!" Aqua protested, hurt.

"It's the truth. Now, go tell him. Or else, I will banish you from the community."

"You wouldn't!"

"Oh, yeah? Try me." Ellie held Aqua's gaze, and her eyes were so authoritative that Aqua could never contradict her.

"Okay! Fine. I'll tell Warren," Aqua yielded. She knew, of course, that she'd eventually have to come clean to him.

"And you will choose between him and Richard," Ellie pressed on.

"Yes, I– I will try."

"Good. You're an idiot, Aqua, but I love you. This is for the best. You know that, right?"

"I do. Thank you, Ellie. I love you, too."

"Great. I need a drink." They walked hand in hand to Ellie's tent, where she kept her wine.

Aqua wasn't sure how she was going to choose between the two men she loved. But she really would try, for her sake, for Warren's, for Richard's. She just wished it didn't hurt so much.


	16. The Time Lost

Bow hunting was Aqua's favorite activity on the Island. Her mother used to practice archery, and she never took up the hobby when she was younger. It was perhaps guilt or the need to feel closer to her mother what drove Aqua to practice with her bow – that Richard had made for her, but gifted it through Ellie – until her fingertips bled. Now that she had mastered it, shooting arrows at makeshift targets in trees or hunting birds was what calmed her down. So the day after her talk with Ellie, she wandered into the jungle at the break of dawn. She needed time to think and figure out what she wanted to do.

She had to choose. Ellie was right; she couldn't have both Warren and Richard. She hated it, but she had to pick one of them and break the other's heart.

If she stayed with Warren, she'd have a life full of love secured. But then there was the issue of telling him about the kiss with Richard. Aqua knew Warren well, and she knew that he would forgive her. Could she live with it? Would she be okay with waking up next to Warren every morning, knowing that she had kissed someone else? Aqua wasn't sure.

What if she chose Richard? She really would be happy; that was proven by how she had felt when she saw him again. But would Richard take her back? If she were in his position, she wouldn't. And being with Richard would mean that she'd have to see a broken-hearted Warren every day, and that Warren would have to see her and Richard together. That was exactly what had driven Richard away from her, seeing Aqua with someone else. She didn't want Warren to be miserable.

So she really was between a rock and a hard place. Both options seemed terrible, and everyone would end up hurt. Aqua tried another route. Who did she want to hurt the less? Warren's heart was so big; he didn't deserve to have it broken. And Richard… Richard would just end up losing her when she died. She'd rather hurt one of them now than end up hurting them both in the long run.

It was noon when Aqua went back to camp with a dozen dead birds hanging over her back. She would talk to Warren first before breaking Richard's heart. She left the birds with Selma – the star cook – and found Warren in their tent, relaxing on the cot.

"Well, there you are!" Warren greeted her. "Went out hunting?"

"Yes. I shot some birds."

"Sounds great!"

"Yes…" How could Aqua tell him? It would destroy him. "Warren?"

"Yes, honey?" He was still lying down on the cot, and Aqua sat down at the end of it.

"I have to tell you something," she started. At this, Warren sat up and gave Aqua a quizzical look. He never stopped smiling his sweet smile. Aqua took a deep breath and just blurted it out, "I kissed Richard." If Warren's heart broke, she couldn't tell, because he only nodded.

"I know," Warren said. Wait, what? What did he mean he knew? Aqua was speechless. Warren chuckled lightly, and she frowned. "Richard told me." Richard had what, now?! Why on earth would he tell Warren? "He came to me about a week after he returned," Warren started explaining, "and he said that he felt really bad about it. He said that  _he_  had kissed  _you_ , though. Assured me that it would never happen again and all. He was actually surprised to hear that you hadn't told me yet."

Though Warren said all this with a smile, his eyes were full of pain. Aqua was unable to look at him, and her heart sank to the ground. She had kept the truth from Warren, and he had spent a week sleeping next to a liar. Tears of shame prevented Aqua from speaking.

"It's alright, honey. I understand. I know you never stopped loving him," Warren said.

He was too good for her. Aqua was completely and utterly undeserving of Warren's love. How could so much goodness exist in one man?

Aqua burst out crying. Warren, in all his kindness, took her in his arms, whispering, "It's okay, honey," over and over, until she couldn't cry anymore. Warren then dried her tears, kissed her forehead, and smiled at her so sweetly that Aqua could barely contain another wave of tears.

"I'm sorry. I'm so– so sorry, Warren," Aqua apologized, sobbing. Warren only smiled.

"No, Aqua, there's no need for that. I'll tell you what. Do you still love Richard?" he asked her. Aqua was dumbfounded. She couldn't answer that question; she didn't know. But Warren must've seen something in her eyes, because he said, "Yeah, I thought so. I love you, Aqua. So much. And because I do, I want you to be with Richard."

"What?" Aqua asked. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. That was not what Warren was supposed to say. He was supposed to be angry, heartbroken. He was supposed to hate her.

"Yes. I release you from me. I want you to be happy, Aqua. Even if your happiness doesn't include me."

"I hope you can forgive me," Aqua begged. Her heart was shattering into a million pieces, and she was unable to believe that Warren existed. He was an angel, too glorious for the human world.

"Oh, Aqua," he said with a lighthearted laugh. "I've already have." And he kissed her one last time.

* * *

The next thing Aqua was fully aware of was moving into Charles and Ellie's tent that evening. Ellie, though comforting and kind towards Aqua, still managed to look like an angry mother. She hated for any of her people to get hurt, but particularly Warren.

"He is too kind. He is the last person on Earth who deserves this kind of pain," she said, and Aqua nodded. "You and Richard better work out; because I could not stand it if Warren's suffering was for nothing."

Aqua could only agree. She settled in to sleep; the next day she would talk to Richard and, hopefully, everything would work out.

What Aqua wasn't counting on was how nervous she would be. It took her two days to finally come out of the tent and face the world and only because Ellie and Charles forced her out. Word had spread that she had broken up with Warren, so everyone either avoided her or gave her dirty looks. But that was fine. Aqua only cared about Richard.

The afternoon sky had covered in clouds by the time Aqua stepped into Richard's tent. He was sitting at his small table, reading, sporting the rectangular glasses that made him look even more handsome. He looked up when Aqua walked in, but didn't smile.

"Can we talk?" Aqua asked. Richard gestured to the other chair, and Aqua took a seat. Not wanting to beat around the bush, Aqua simply spat it out, "I broke up with Warren. Or, rather, he broke up with me."

"So I heard," Richard simply said.

"You did?" Aqua asked, not really expecting an answer.

"Yes. Actually, Warren told me." Warren had what? What was it between the two of them? "He came to tell me yesterday that I could freely be with you, if I wanted."

"Oh…" And did he want to? Aqua didn't dare ask.

"He said that  _you_ wanted to be with me, and that's why you kissed me."

Aqua looked at Richard, her face burning. She remembered that time, many years ago, when they both had sat at this same table, when Aqua had told Richard her story. She was so different now, but was Richard? Aqua dismissed the thought; that thought had been part of what she had used to convince herself that she shouldn't be with him. Because he couldn't change.

"So, what is it that you want, Aqua?" Richard asked.

"I don't know," Aqua answered. Her breathing accelerated, and she ran her eyes over Richard's fading scars. What if the monster had killed him? She couldn't lose him. "Warren seemed to believe that… That I wanted you–"

"Warren is seldom wrong."

"–and I think I do." There was silence then, in which only a high-pitched buzzing ringed in Aqua's ears. Then Richard sighed deeply.

"Are you sure?" he asked, and his voice was full of the pain of the past.

"I think so."

"I can't do with 'I think sos.' You either do, or you don't." The anger bottled up for the past seven years was finally slipping through Richard's words.

"I'm sorry," escaped Aqua's lips.

"What are you sorry for?" Richard demanded, cocking his head.

A tense silence fell upon them. There were too many words that both of them wanted to say, but neither could force them out. Aqua knew that she deserved Richard's anger. Maybe, just maybe, if he finally expressed himself, they could move past it and be happy together.

Outside, rain started pouring. Aqua remembered that night when she cuddled up against Richard after seeing the monster outside their little tent, their hearts beating like they belonged to each other. It was raining then, too. No rainy night with Warren had ever compared to that one. If only she could hug Richard again, everything would be fine. They'd be finally happy. Together.

But Richard's frown reminded Aqua of the pain she had caused him.

"For what I did to you," she answered Richard's question at last. "I want you, Richard. I choose you. I'm sorry it took me seven years to realize."

Richard sat back on the chair and looked away. What was he thinking? What would he say?

"I spent those seven years trying to get over you," he said. "And when I do, you say that you want me? Do you think that's fair?"

The words stung. Tears pooled in Aqua's eyes and streamed down when she blinked. That was what she was actually expecting Richard to say, but she didn't think the words would hurt that much. She was a fool for thinking that Richard would take her back so easily. She was a fool for thinking that he would take her back at all.

Aqua didn't believe there was something else to say. She blinked, swallowed, and stood up. She opened her mouth several times as if to say something, but nothing came out. Richard's angry frown looked foreign on his face. With one last look at him, she walked into the rain.

Aqua kept on walking until she reached the edge of the trees. Fool! She deserved Richard's rejection, and more.

Maybe she could do what Richard did and live in the wilderness of the island on her own. Yes! Yes, she could do that. She turned around, wildly and stupidly determined to get her bow and run away, but Richard was there. How come? He was angry at her. He  _should_ be angry at her.

Nevertheless, he was standing a few steps from her, soaking wet.  _He followed me,_ Aqua wistfully thought. The rain made it slightly hard to see his expression, and even harder to hear his words.

"It isn't fair," Richard all but screamed at her.

"I know," Aqua answered.

"I shouldn't want you back."

"You really shouldn't."

"I'm angry at you."

"I deserve it."

"Then why do I love you so much?"

Aqua was frozen in place. Surely the rain had distorted Richard's words. Aqua gasped when Richard, closing the space between them, grabbed her face between his hands.

"Did you hear me?" he asked softly. "I love you, Aqua. I've always have."

Aqua's legs wanted to give up. If it wasn't because Richard's hands felt so real, she would swear that she was in a dream. That dream that she had had a few times where Richard told her that he loved her and they lived happily ever after. But this didn't feel quite like a dream. He was dreamy, and the scenario was dream-like, yes, but Aqua knew that it was very real. Before the rain could wash her away, she said out loud what she hadn't dared admitting before. She said the words to the one person who had always been destined to hear them.

"I love you."

Richard's kiss on her lips felt like paradise. If Aqua was ever destined to come to the Island, it was solely for this. Every occurrence in her life had led her to this very moment. To Richard's heart beating against hers at the same pace. To her fingers brushing Richard's dark hair. To their lips, their bodies, their souls fusing into one.

Aqua regretted wasting seven years away from Richard. But with that one passionate kiss, they made up for the time lost. The rivulets of warm rainwater running down their faces purified them of the anger and the sadness.

Because, embraced as they were, what could ever go wrong again?


	17. The Cards on the Table

Richard hugged Aqua so tightly that, even though she felt like she could crumble, she knew Richard would never let her. He lifted her off the ground and spun her around, laughing lightheartedly – a sound that was extremely rare on the Island. He kissed her nose and forehead and cheeks and the top of her head. He was once again the man she had fallen in love with; the loving, sweet, caring man hidden under layers of detachment. Aqua wondered why she had ever thought that she couldn’t be with Richard.

“Let’s go to the cove,” Richard whispered in Aqua’s ear.

“What?” Aqua asked, laughing.

“Let’s run away there. Right now.” He was smiling, and his smile quite literally cleared the cloudy sky. Aqua would never again resist that smile.

She nodded enthusiastically, and Richard laughed again. Aqua started walking back to camp, but Richard had a different plan. He effortlessly scooped her up like she was made of feathers and carried her back. Aqua laughed once more – they just couldn’t stop laughing! – and wrapped her arms around Richard’s neck, resting her head on his shoulder. She could live the rest of her life in Richard’s arms.

After packing a bag each and hanging their bows on their backs, they took off towards the jungle.

“Hang on,” Aqua paused. “I’ll go tell Ellie. Last time we didn’t, remember?”

She ran over to Ellie’s tent, where she found her and Charles snuggling up on their cot. Ellie went cherry-red when she noticed Aqua at the door.

“What do you want?” Ellie demanded. “You’re drenched!”

“Yes. Long story. Kind of. I’m just letting you know that Richard and I are heading to our cove.”

“Richard and you?” Charles asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes.”

“Heading where?” asked Ellie.

“Love beach, Elle. We’ll explain it when we come back. If we do. Anyway, tootles!” And she turned to leave, dumbfounding Charles and Ellie.

“She’s never said ‘tootles’ before,” she heard Ellie say to Charles behind her.

Though it rained, the sun peered from behind the clouds in the sky. It was Aqua’s favorite kind of rainy day, because the Island looked surreal, the air was pure and fresh, and there were rainbows everywhere.

Richard and Aqua walked hand in hand through the jungle. Richard’s grip was so firm that Aqua suspected he was scared of letting her go again. He also wouldn’t stop looking at her. He almost tripped several times because of this, which was so unusual and strange to see from him.

When they reached their cove – Love Beach – it felt like coming home. Richard and Aqua looked at each other, smiling, and they knew. They _were_ home. It was not camp; it was this beach. This beach where they had gone through so much. Where they had met the real Richard and the real Aqua. This cove had the real essence of their love. This cove was where they had fallen in love, and where they would fall in love over and over and over again.

 

* * *

 

The rain stopped soon after they got to their beach. Richard and Aqua set up their camp, which consisted of a small tent – yes, the same one from years before – a cot set outside, and blankets. Aqua built a fire in a matter of minutes – oh, when it had taken her hours that first night on the Island! – and set some logs near it. She took off her drenched clothes and placed them over the logs to dry. Richard did the same, and lustful thoughts crossed her mind when she saw his bare chest. She shook them off, knowing that there was plenty of time for that. Instead, she changed into dry clothes and sat down, cross-legged on a blanket, not far from the ocean.

“I think there’s a lot of things we need to talk about, don’t you?” she asked Richard, who, of course, had followed her over.

“I think there are,” he said.

Aqua took a moment to marvel at the music of the beach; the waves, the seagulls, the air rustling the leaves. She hadn’t been to the beach in a while. She felt new.

“Richard, how do you feel?” Aqua asked.

“How do I feel? I feel ecstatic!”

“Me, too.” Aqua smiled warmly at him, then turned serious. “But, Richard, I believe that if our relationship is to succeed, we need to lay every single one of our cards on the table.”

Richard thought it over for a second.

“Sounds fair,” he said.

“Good, good. You start. I think… Well, I think it’s fair and healthy if you tell me how I made you feel when, you know…”

“You left me?” Richard said bluntly. Aqua flinched. “Sorry,” he apologized. “Well, clearly, I was mad.”

“You had every right to be.”

“I suppose. I felt bad for being angry at you, though, because I knew that you must’ve had a good reason to leave me. But then again, I didn’t know why.”

“I’m sorry for that,” Aqua whispered, her eyes tearing up.

“That’s what made me so angry at you. I guess, if only I had known why, I could’ve been okay.” As he was saying this, Aqua recoiled and looked away. But Richard held her face, making her look at him, and smiled. “But all of that anger is gone now. It doesn’t matter anymore.”

Aqua smiled. She was so lucky.

“What else did you feel? Tell me everything you’ve wanted to tell me this past seven years. Please,” she begged. She knew it would hurt, but she also knew that making Richard talk was the healthiest thing to do, for both of them.

Richard sighed. He gave Aqua a look that said, “Are you sure?” and Aqua smiled and nodded. They held hands.

“Alright. Well, at first, I was very, very angry. I put you in a tent with Ellie out of spite.”

“I know, but I’m glad that you did,” Aqua interrupted him, chuckling lightly. “I hated it at first, but I can’t imagine how my life would be if you hadn’t forced Ellie and I together.”

“That’s good,” Richard answered, chuckling too. “I think it was immature on my part, but, I don’t know, I was upset. Anyway,” he shrugged. “After that, the anger faded away fast. I just couldn’t stop loving you. But it hurt to love you.” He paused for a moment. “It took a lot of courage to talk to you on your birthday. Do you remember?”

“Of course I remember. I was starting to regret my decision by then.”

“Were you?” There was a hint of pain in Richard’s eyes.

“Yes. My mind was all over the place. I kept telling myself that I had already hurt you and that it wasn’t fair to go back to you and say, ‘Hey! I actually do love you!’”

“I wish you had done that,” Richard said, melancholy.

“I wish I had done that, too,” Aqua confessed. “I kept making up stupid excuses to not go back to you…” A look at Richard’s hurt face shut her up. He was so heartbroken; she could read it in his face that he really wanted to go back in time and fix everything. She did, too, but right now it wasn’t about her. It was all about Richard. “But you go on.”

“Right…” He sighed. “Right. Well, I didn’t want to be apart from you, that’s why I finally talked to you. But when I did, I realized how sad I was. It hurt a lot, so I remained distant.

“Like I said, I still loved you. I made you all those gifts – your bow, your spear, your arrows. I was too scared that you would reject me again if I gave them to you directly, so I told others to do so for me.”

“I always knew they were from you. I loved every single one of them,” Aqua confessed, and Richard’s eyes sparkled.

They remained quiet for a while, listening to the waves as the sky began clearing.

“And me and Warren?” Aqua broke the silence. “You left. Were you that upset?”

“Oh, I was. I was jealous. Terribly jealous. I didn’t think there could be something worse than your rejection, but, alas, there it was. I wanted to be happy for you, but – don’t get me wrong – I just couldn’t. I was selfish; I wanted you to be with me, not Warren. I was angry– at both of you, at myself. I couldn’t get over it, so the best solution I could think of was leaving. I apologize for not saying goodbye.”

“You don’t have to, Richard,” Aqua said quietly.

“Perhaps. I’m still sorry, though, because _I_ was sad that I didn’t get to see you one last time. Then I came back, and you kissed me, and I thought we could finally be together, but you were still with Warren,” Richard continued. “I didn’t think that was fair, Aqua. I felt tricked. That’s why I was so cold.”

“Oh, Richard, I am so sorry.”

I tear rolled down Aqua’s cheek, but Richard put his hands on her face, smiling and shaking his head.

“Don’t be, please. Thank you for listening. I truly needed to get all of this out.”

“I know. Thank you telling me.” Aqua grabbed Richard’s hand and kissed his palm. She truly was glad that Richard had finally expressed what he had felt. However, she still owed him an explanation. “It’s my turn to be honest with you.”

Richard nodded slowly.

“I’d really like to know what I did to lose you,” he said.

Aqua’s heart broke. How unfair she had been to Richard. He didn’t deserve to think that it had been his fault that the two of them had drifted apart.

“Oh, Richard, my dear,” Aqua began, “you didn’t do anything wrong. None of this mess has been because of you. It was me, I was the fool.”

“I think this is the first time you ever call me _dear,_ dear,” Richard whispered.

Aqua smiled, and kissed him ever so softly. He really was her dear; her dearest.

She inhaled deeply, ready to come clean to Richard.

“I was an idiot, Richard. That’s truly what encapsulates the whole mess I made in our lives.”

Richard frowned slightly. Aqua thought that it made sense if this wasn’t what he was expecting to hear.

“What were you thinking?” Richard asked. Aqua was taken aback. “I mean, when I told you I was immortal. What was going through your mind? Thinking about that has been eating me alive all these years.”

“Oh. So many things, Richard.” How could she best explain it? She sighed. “I didn’t really trust men when I was younger. So that you had kept the truth about yourself made me feel deceived. As if you wanted to take advantage of me, somehow. I don’t know.

“Then, putting that aside, the fact that you were older than me because you were _immortal_ was just… too much. The last straw. I had gone through so much trauma; being lost at sea, losing my family, being trapped in an island with a monster, time-traveling… and all of that in a matter of days. My sanity was already so unstable. I completely freaked out. I felt like I was in a nightmare –a nightmare that you were a part of, like the wolf waiting to eat the girl. I didn’t think you were–”

“You didn’t think I was what?”

“Human. I didn’t think you were human,” Aqua admitted, her ears hot.

“I see,” Richard simply whispered. “How so?”

“How so? Well, I– I don’t know! Everything, I guess. First of all, humans age. And you were this mysterious, scary mass-murderer…”

“Mass-murderer?”

“The Americans, Richard.”

“Ah. Right.” Richard went quiet for a little while. “I suppose it makes sense.”

“Do you understand, then? I was… scared. I suddenly found myself trapped in this surreal, impossible place, where everything was scary. Unfortunately, that included you. It didn’t take long, though, for me to realize that I was wrong, about the Island and about you. You weren’t scary anymore. Do I make sense?”

Richard nodded as he analyzed Aqua’s words.

“Is that it, then?” he asked slowly. “I scared you?”

Aqua blinked.

“Well… yes. Every aspect of you seemed very unnatural to me.”

“That’s okay. Sometimes I don’t think I’m human myself,” Richard said, and Aqua couldn’t decide if that was funny or sad.            

“There were just too many strange things going on.”

“Trust me, I understand. I wouldn’t have wanted you to be in a situation you weren’t comfortable with. Thank you for trusting me with this,” Richard said. Aqua smiled at him, and she knew she would always trust him with her life.

“I’m so sorry it took me seven years to finally make up my mind.”

“I forgive you,” Richard said, and those were the words Aqua had waited to hear for so long. “I hope you can forgive yourself, too.”

Aqua nodded. She hadn’t realized she blamed herself so much. Yes, she could forgive herself, and Richard’s kisses could help her with that.

“You truly have the biggest, most human heart I know.” Aqua said sincerely.

“I appreciate it,” Richard said, cocking his head and grinning, “but I’d argue that that’s actually Warren.”

Aqua felt a pull in her guts.

“Shit. Warren.” Aqua dropped her head, hiding her face with her hands. “I’ve been thinking about him for the last couple of days. Couple of weeks, actually. And I came to the conclusion that, even though I really was in love with Warren, he was… a replacement for the love I couldn’t get from you.” She peeked at Richard from between her fingers; he was frowning, puzzled. “This is terrible, but… I always compared him to you. I didn’t realize– or, well, I suppose I didn’t want to admit it to myself, but I always did compare him to you. How tall he was, his eyes, his voice. Ever since that first moment he showed up in my life.” She paused. “I’m a terrible person, aren’t I?”

“No, Aqua, I don’t think you are. Did you tell Warren this?”

“No! No, of course I didn’t. I’ve already hut him enough. Ignorance is bliss, right?” She looked at him, almost begging him to agree with her.

“Right. I suppose this is the kind of thing Warren doesn’t really need to know about. You’re right, it would hurt him more.”

“Yes. I love him enough to not do that to him.”

They both nodded, silently agreeing to never, ever hurt Warren again.

“Aqua?”

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

“Richard?”

“Yes?”

“I love you, too.”

A kiss, closed eyes, and foreheads touching.

“Aqua?”

“Yes?”

“Are these all of our cards?”

“There’s one more.” Aqua took a deep breath. “It’s something that’s been bothering me for years, and something that I used to try to convince myself that we were better off apart.” She swallowed. “You’re immortal. I’m not. I’m going to die. Eventually. You won’t. I’ll grow old, like I’ve been growing old these past seven years, and you’ll stay the same. What will happen then?”

Aqua didn’t think she had seen Richard’s eyes tear up before. He kissed her forehead meaningfully and spoke.

“This is why I’ve always tried to not get too attached to anyone. I dread losing them,” he murmured. Aqua wiped the single tear from his cheek, and he stared at the ocean. “I’m constantly thinking about that. But I just… accept that everyone dies. It’s different with you. You’re the first person I’ve been in love with ever since I became immortal. And it’s been so hard to accept that you, too, will die. I don’t want to accept it. That’s why…” And he went silent.

“That’s why what, Richard?”

He looked back at her, shame and hope mixed in his eyes.

“Why I asked Jacob if he could make you immortal if you wanted to.”

Aqua’s eyes opened wide.

“And what did he say?”

“He said yes.”

Aqua’s mouth opened slightly, and then she bit her bottom lip.

“Don’t get your hopes high,” she started slowly, “but I’ve considered it.”

“You have?”

“Don’t get your hopes high,” she repeated. “I didn’t believe it possible. But if it is… Well, I don’t know. I’d have to really think it through.”

“No pressure,” Richard assured her, half laughing. He’d gotten his hopes high.

That was fine. Aqua had considered becoming…unhuman like Richard for a while. She didn’t want to be older than him. Perhaps thirty-six was a good age to be forever. But tonight was not the night to think about that. She still had six years to make up her mind.

So they smiled at each other. Now all of their cards were on the table. No more secrets, no more hiding. What they had wished for – be it secretly or openly – for years had finally come true. They kissed again and laughed with joy. Richard and Aqua were finally together, and nothing would bring them apart ever again.


End file.
